Give me closure
Searching for solace
Closure - am I still lost?
And so you've forgotten me ...
For these lifetimes gone by
I can't help question why
Through the years denied this
Tears gone uncried
And no face to relate to names to reply
Especially when the memories
Cut like a knife
Left with just pages to which I confide
~ Divine Heresy ~ Closure ~
Closure ... having to severe the energetic cord that once connected you to another. I read that “this unbroken cord may leave an open channel between you and another, through which emotions and energy can continue to flow” (Daily OM).
Not knowing how to put a proper end to a relationship can influence any healthy relationship planned in the future. It is like having an “open account” ... which is when you are afraid of truly letting someone go because you always want to have that access, afraid you might miss out.
Sadly some relationships evolve from mutually supportive and life-giving bonds to unhealthy scenarios. Endings that are abrupt or subtle, via e-mail, phone or in person, with words or silence ... all need to be mourned and processed. It still hurts and deserves closure and peace, especially if there was no real good-bye.
So when you are ready, cutting this “cord” can help you rid of old baggage, unnecessary attachments and release you from connections that no longer serve you.
Start with acceptance and adjustment. You have to come to the realization that it is over. Respect the time spent and accept the fact that this chapter of your life has now come to and end.
Next, identify with what the experience has taught you instead of dwelling on the pain. Visualize all the benefits and be proud of yourself. Pat yourself on the back for having the courage to work through it and tell yourself that your future is so much better than your past.
Finding and cutting unwanted “cords” can be a gentle process. Just start to believe that you are not severing a relationship, but you are severing the connection that is no longer serving you both. You are setting yourself and others free from the ties that bind.
You see, closure looks forward by letting go and moving on. That is what closure gives us. We may have gone through the grieving process but still not have the closure we need. By recognizing, accepting, understanding, integrating and practicing gratitude, we can come full circle to experience closure.
Closure helps it all make sense. It turns something seemingly broken into something useful, purposeful, and lovely. A different perspective, a lesson learned, a new beginning ...