Saturday, March 28, 2015

" Failure ... "

“ ... Life will come our way, it has only just begun
The world will die alone, the frail will fall below
Time will take our place, we return it back to one
The calm before the cold, the long and lonely road
Look for the light that leads me home

Tired of feeling lost, tired of letting go
Tear the whole world down, tear the whole world down

We bury the sunlight, we bury the sunlight
Failure, failure ... “

~ Breaking Benjamin ~ Failure ~

It is still hard to say the F word out loud.  Most of us feel awkward, vulnerable, uncomfortable with the idea.    We are afraid of it and don’t want to even mention it in case we jinx our situation ... and by the way, the F word I am referring to is ... failure.  

For most of my life, I allowed failure to define me.  I let failure decide if I was going to achieve what I set out.  I let failure guide my outcome.  Regardless of new work, new ventures or new goals, failure always crept into my mind.  

Yet I have had to learn that over time, learning to love failure and embrace it in ways, give me power.  Failure does not require me to give up, it requires me to learn ... more.  I have had to learn that failure can be a momentary defeat, something that is a small obstacle, to again, learn and move through.  

Failure is only real once you accept it as real
you only fail at something once you give up on it ... 

Failure gives us a to re-evaluate and find the gift within what has occurred, teaching something valuable.  Failure will never seem permanent, nor will it shatter your confidence and belief in yourself.  

Failure may paralyze you,  
but it doesn’t define you ...

If we simply view failure as progress, we realize we are moving forward.  The only way to never achieve anything in life is to never try to do anything.  When we experience failure, we are in the process of learning, growing and achieving our goals. 

Regardless of your level of risk taking, your level of success will be equivalent to the level of the failure that came before it ... failure is not as important as the courage it takes to try ... keep going, you are enough xx

Wednesday, March 18, 2015

" Rushing ... "

“ ... And the weeks and the months go rushing by
This year we have learned how to live
How to forget, and how to forgive without fear, ohh ooh

... This year I pray for you, uh
And I thank God for you
Just wanna be with you

This year that's all I wanna do
Day by day, I'm gonna get my way
This year I pray for you
Seasons turn, I've got a lot to learn ...

This year we have learned how to live ... “

~ Moby ~ Rushing ~

Ralph Emerson said “we are always getting ready to live but never living”.  It seems that most people are busy, short of time and rushing through life ... but what if you just be in the moment?  Not practical you might think because you have so much to do, so much to say.  Fair enough ... but have you ever tried slowing down and taking a backseat to enjoy the simple pleasures life has to offer?

When we rush through life, we forget to life in the NOW.   

When you rush through life, you miss out on the journey.  You miss out on living in the present and you miss out on those precious moments of life.  All because you are busy trying to next step, get to the next place.  

So, I call bullshit ... because when you are busy in your life with lots to be done each day, you are simply making an excuse to deal with yourself.  What are you avoiding, what don’t you want to deal with ... what IS the rush?

To be busy has become a way of life.  It signifies importance for some and for others, a perception of how responsible one is.  Yet more of us are clocking longer hours and we seem to even pack our free time with extra activities.  Plus, we do it to ourselves ... the addiction to the adrenaline rush of doing too much and at the last minute ... maybe to seek appreciation ... maybe to increase our value ... maybe if we do more, get better, go faster ... it just becomes a habit.

Thankfully, we can rebel against a hectic lifestyle and slow down to enjoy life.  A slow paced life means you make time to enjoy your morning, instead of rushing off to work.  A slow paced life means you enjoy your conversation rather than being distracted by your phone.  Personally, slowing down is a conscious choice I make ... and not always an easy one.  Yet I have a greater appreciation for life and the happiness available to me at any given moment.  I just need to be here, now, because I am constantly reminded, there is no other place to be.

Prioritize and begin by doing less.  Focus on what is really important, what really needs to be done and let go of the rest.  Become mindful of whatever you are doing in the moment.  Be fully available for others and listen because we think we listen, but we are really thinking about ourselves and what we want to say.  Make a point to do one task at a time.  And always go back to your breathe.  If you find yourself speeding up and stressing out ... pause and take a breathe, by focusing on each breath will bring you back to the present moment and slow yourself down.  

Most people treat the present moment as if it were an obstacle 
that they need to overcome ... since the present moment is life itself, 
it is an insane way to live ~ Eckhart Tolle

Friday, March 6, 2015

" Regret ... "

Maybe I've forgotten
The name and the address
Of everyone I've ever known,
It's nothing I regret ...

I would like a place I can call my own
Have a conversation on the telephone
Wake up everyday, that would be a start
I would not complain 'bout my wounded heart ...

Just wait 'till tomorrow
I guess that's what they all say
Just before they fall apart...

~ New Order ~ Regret ~

We grow a lot when we are faced with our own mortality.  We begin to reflect on the past with pride or regret.  And that regret may have common themes that start to surface again and again.  

How many dreams have gone unfulfilled?  How many don’t have the courage to live a life true to self?  How many don’t have the courage to express their true feelings?  

When a loss occurs, we reflect on what we had.  Until we are able to fill it with something or someone else.  We think we have time and we rarely think we will run out of it.  Yet it is very important to try to honour at least some of your dreams along the way.  

By simplifying your lifestyle, making conscious choices and creating more space in your life you become more open to life rather than wishing you did more.

By expressing your feelings in a un-harmful way, you become who you are truly capable of becoming.  Suppressing emotions manifest as a dis-ease or ill-ness in the body.  

By giving relationships the time and effort they deserve, you realize the full benefits of the human connection.  Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.

“ ... it is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships ... “

By choosing happiness for you rather than comfort, familiarity or playing it safe.  Fear of change can make you pretend to others, to yourself that you are content.  

So whether it be a wake up call, an epiphany, a mid-life crisis or simply choosing to live the life you want, do it now ... your future self will thank-you for it.

Friday, February 27, 2015

" My body, my choice, my life, my death ... "

my body, my choice, my life, my death

Waking up this morning to the news of Jessica Ainscough passing away was heart breaking.  Jessica had survived a rare cancer diagnosis for 7 years.  At 22 years old, she was diagnosed with epithelioid sarcoma in her arm and shoulder.  Jess elected not to have an amputation and instead pursued the Gerson Therapy.  I was first introduced about Jess in 2011 while visiting the Gerson Clinic in Tijuana, Mexico.  I’ve been inspired by Jess through her motivational speaking, blogging and book, Make Peace With Your Plate

With this sad news circulating within social media, many are quick to voice their opinions on what should and should not have done.  And loads are voicing in on their view on “alternative treatment” and the quackery behind it ...

Yet what ever happened to leaving space and time for others to heal?  How important is it to share your view on what you think when a young woman has enough courage to stand her ground in the face of adversity?  Do the “I told you so” pundits feel vindicated?  Does it feel good to “predict” a young woman’s death years ago only to dig it up in a juicy article, slamming anything other than conventional treatment?  How do you know her death could have been “prevented” or she could have been “saved” if she was more “transparent” in her life?

my body, my choice, my life, my death

I find it curious when critics say that Jess’s choices were misguided, insane and selfish.  I find it curious when the same critics have NEVER walked in her shoes ... why not ask one of us who actually live with cancer how life really is?   

Jess was one of those who lived life fully despite what reality presented itself.  Death at a young age is only tragic when those who leave us have potential to do so much more.  And although Jess was only 30, the impact that this courageous woman has left in my life is beyond words.  Whether these words silence or arouse you, for me, Jessica Ainscough was an amazing health and wellness advocate.  Her courage, conviction and love for life was, and will continue to be, incredibly inspirational.  She was a powerful example of what trusting in yourself regardless of the possibilities is all about.  She lived for what she believed in ... 

my body, my choice, my life, my death

Sunday, February 22, 2015

" Conscious ... "

“ Now, that I'm here
breaking my relationship with time and space
watching my life through the milky glasses of a window
now it all becomes so clear
If I had the opportunity to smell
the enchanted wind of a spring flower
I would take a deep breathe
to relax ... 

Now, that I'm here
breaking my relationship with time and space
watching my life through the clear glasses of a window
I get aware of the small things which are least the greatest
I left my life
my physical form of life behind
I realize my blunted and senseless way of life
I should have lived my life much more conscious “

~ Kai Tracid ~ Conscious ~ 

Most of our conscious choices originate from fear.  We limit ourselves in response to these underlying fears.  When an opportunity to do something outside of our comfort zone, we speak how amazing it would be to just “go for it”, yet we also tell ourselves that it would probably be best to just keep doing what we are doing.  We sabotage our growth into new directions and cultivate a sense of stagnation.

Could we be happier taking more risks?  
Could we gain some satisfaction in trying something new? ... 

When we find that the things we use to do, that gave us contentment, are no longer satisfying, it’s time to make that change.  There is a sense of transition, perhaps outgrowing the old.  And graciously we know that with new endings there are always new beginnings.  

Challenging your limiting beliefs is a great place to start.  Ask yourself if your choices are supporting your intentions or someone else’s expectations?  

Full of excitement and fear, eagerness and anxiety and every other emotion to fill in the gaps, when we make a conscious choice, we take a stand.  And sometimes the reactions and their residual effects creep in.  So, rather than allowing them to feed your self-doubt, consider them as signs along your path.  Use them as a tool for adjustment.  Consider them a blessing rather than a hurdle.

Choosing to live a conscious life is not something you do just once ... it is a way of living.  And thankfully, it is simply thinking about everything you do and say.  Because it matters.  

It is easy to live life on autopilot and do what we always do because that’s what we are use to doing.  Yet it is more fulfilling to live the life we have the potential to experience.  And that choice is always available to us.