"Here I Go Again ..."

"Though I keep searching for an answer
I never seem to find what I'm looking for
Oh Lord, I pray you give me strength to carry on
'Cause I know what it meansTo walk along the lonely street of dreams
Here I go again on my own
Going down the only road I've ever known
Like a drifter, I was born to walk alone
And I've made up my mind
I ain't wasting no more time"

~ Whitesnake ~ Here I Go Again

***

Well we are off, on week 32, working the programme, the therapy with no deviation.  Yep it is second nature now, knowing when to juice, when to enema, when to medicate, when to get the soup on, when to bake the potatoes, when to get the groceries and more importantly ... when to rest.  When I share with friends how long it has been they are surprised ... it has been a wild wild ride indeed.  And the latest and greatest ... well, I had another round of tests and all is looking really well.  My family doctor is very happy, encouraged and relieved to be honest.  She has been an amazing support in this whole journey getting all my paperwork and requisitions sorted.  I thank God for her often.  The reports are off to the Gerson doctors today and I anticipate they will be as happy as they were last time around.  And although I knew in my heart that I am doing well & I am healing ... a little voice in me said "what if" again.  Dang those little voices?!  But my dear friend Jolene said to me that these little pangs of doubt are just check-stops, nothing more nothing less.  I still hate sitting and waiting for test results.  But don't we all?  Whether it be a pop quiz in school, a final exam in uni, or a medical diagnosis.  I just don't get use to it ... 

I have to say the love, support, encouragement and confidence around me, from the practitioners I have been working with to my family and friends have helped me on my chosen healing path.  A path that is unfamiliar for some and discredited in most circles.  Initially a path that I was anxious of as well.  But knowing that 8 months later, things are looking up and heading in the right direction.  Hallelujah!!!

The questions I ask myself now is what does life look like from here on out?  I have done what I wanted, achieved what I set out to do thus far.  Now, it is so exciting to think ... what now and how wonderful can it be?  I am more motivated than I have been in such a long time.  The feeling is indescribable ... but as one of my natural practitioners said to me ...

 When we live our life instead of preventing death, our Healing begins

 .... ahhhhh what a brilliant thought!

So as I sit on my couch wrapping up this quick blog post, knowing in the back of my mind I have to prep the soup and potatoes for lunch, life feels good, so good.  I commit to changing those negative thoughts, those tough little voices and I know I am exactly where I am suppose to be ... and loving it ...

" Circle of Life ... "

"Some of us fall by the wayside
And some of us soar to the stars 

And some of us sail through our troubles
And some have to live with the scars
In the circle of life
It's the wheel of fortune
It's the leap of faith
It's the band of hope
Till we find our place
On the path unwinding
In the circle, the circle of life"

~ Elton John ~ Circle of Life ~
***

Well I guess it's been almost one full week since we last connected on this blog.  And in the last week, a great deal has transpired.  We have been sending healing prayers to Paul and his family whom I wrote about last week.  And they are working.  Paul has been inspired by the love and energy he is receiving and is fighting back.  Truly a miracle is happening in front of our very own eyes and we are more than thrilled to witness this amazing time.  We continue to send powerful healing prayers, blessings and energy knowing in our hearts He is listening and answering.

As well this week, there has been an emotional roller coaster ride of events happen .... Besides Paul's gentle recovery as mentioned, we had a good friend of ours, Karen, become a first time Grandma to baby Sienna.  We had another couple friend of ours planning their wedding festivities, and then we just found out that another friend of ours whom we were blessed to meet in Tijuana passed away.  Yes, an emotional ride is an understatement.  What is has done is drain my energy ... I have not been this exhausted in a very long time.  Probably because of the opposing emotions ~ sorrow and joy, pain and comfort, suffering and compassion, and weakness and strength.  All the things I wrote about last week.  We were hoping that there would just be illumination for a while, with darkness leaving us.  Only brightness and sunny days ahead ... But the reality is that this is truly the circle of life: birth and death. 

There are miracles that do happen as well.  I firmly believe our time is up with He needs us.  I use to believe that our destiny is written ... but what I do feel now is that we can negotiate ... ask for more time, be given another chance.  And, if He can do without for a while, then well, we re-write that destiny.  How that is decided, is unknown and some may read this and think .... ah, o-kay, surrrrrrrrre or what-ever.  And hey to each their own.  But for me, this is how I make sense of all this.  

It is an emotional time, a trying time, a real test.  I write a fair bit about personal journey, following our own path, believing we heal individually ... but I have not written about miracles.  And truly living and breathing human beings are miracles.  Miracles are when your friend is close to walking thru heavens doors and instead is inspired to fight, negotiate and re-write his destiny.  Miracles are when a precious baby is born out of love and shares her happiness with just her presence on our Earth.  Miracles are when a friend passes on, leaving an impact on her family and friends much further than she may have realized when she was alive.  Miracles are when two people find true love.  Miracles are the circle of life.  

As obvious as it may seem for some, there are times when things just click, make sense and you have an A-HA! moment.  This week, there has been many of them.  Life just carries on, and it must carry on.  You see, we can mourn and celebrate in the same moment.  And really, life presents those moments to us in those ways for a reason.  What that reason is ... well, still working on that.  But I know in my heart, there are blessings around every corner, in every place ... in every BODY.  

And maybe this circle of life is also a circle of healing ... an opportunity for growth ... and opportunity to create the world we wish to live in versus fight the world we are currently in.  This is what I choose to take from this last week ... emotionally charged but as I sit here on Sunday night blogging my thoughts, I have a sense of peace, solace and a tad bit more understanding of the concept of the circle of life.

"There is a well of infinity hidden within each Soul. 

There you will find an incredible energy source, 

beyond your broadest understanding. 

It is Light and Healing. The Force of Nature. The essence of Love"

"Dream Weaver ... oh, Dream Healer"

"Dream weaver 
I've just closed my eyes again 
Climbed aboard the dream weaver train 
Driver take away my worries of today 
And leave tomorrow behind 
Ooh dream weaver"

~ Reo Speedwagon ~ Dream Weaver ~
***


Yesterday, I had a chance to go to the DreamHealer session in Calgary.  For some of you, you already know what this is all about.  ADAM is the DreamHealer.  He is a gifted individual who helps you with visualization tools and energy healing.  Now for all the skeptics out there, he does not have a magic wand, nor does he heal you ... YOU HEAL YOURSELF.  


I had a great deal of anxiety and excitement the entire day.  As my friend Joelle said, you could feel the energy and the healing already taking place prior to Adam's appearance.  Initially, we saw a video about Ronnie Hawkins who was diagnosed with terminal pancreatic cancer and given minimal time.  Adam had an opportunity to perform individual healing sessions on Ronnie, remotely, and soon after Ronnie was cancer-free.  His doctors have no explanation and have called it a Miracle.  Along with this story, other testimonials were shown of people whom have fully recovered from serious illnesses.  It was emotional to watch as you could feel the empathy within the crowd.  Soon after, Adam appeared.  He explained that he has been speaking to crowds now for almost 10 years.  He no longer does individual sessions as he has less time and energy.  And his intention is to show how we can heal ourselves.  We just need tools, and he was here to show us how.  How our bodies know to heal itself.


Adam re-affirmed what I have come to understand and what resonates with me.  In the past, I had heard that our bodies talk to us .. but I didn't pay attention.  Adam talked in length about universal energy, our energy and energy healing and medicine.  Since he finished his degree in Molecular Biology and now studying to become a Naturopath Doctor, he provided scientific information explaining the power of intention - How our intentions affect our metabolism?  How do such intentions directly heal ourselves most effectively and efficiently?  He discussed our internal influences ~ Beliefs, Emotions, Intentions, Perception of Time, Cellular Memory and Mind-body connection.  He discussed our external influences ~ Healthcare Practitioner, Media, Education, Family and Friends, Diet, Exercise and Habits.

We learned about DNA and proteins, epi-genetics, gene expression and how our environment affects our healing process.  We also had a chance to participate in group healing sessions.  You could feel the energy in the crowd even before the healing session began.  With that much positive intention, it was simply Powerful.  We had to imagine drawing in energy from our feet, from Mother Earth, and expanding our auras.  Then, we had to imagine our auras merging with our fellow participants.  Next we had to practice our visualizations, or if that was difficult, project positivity ... as Adam said be "ridiculously positive".  

Our intentions to heal and/or heal others.    

So how do I explain the group healing sessions?  Well, everyone was so different ... My experience was powerful, I felt movement, I felt protected, I felt some twitches, pains, presence, dizziness.  Then, I felt empowered ... my intentions were strong, loud and clear.  The room was dark, silent yet full of warm healing energy.  Adam takes everyone's combined aura and works from a hologram to energetically affect our bodies.  It really is hard to explain, it has to be experienced to truly get it.  And, once they sessions were over, I was exhausted.  I needed to sleep and just let the process unfold.  

It will continue to unfold, as healing is a process, a unique journey.

"Practicing these affirmations and visualizations every day is essential.  Our thoughts and intentions are constantly influencing our health and our conscious intention must be synchronized with our subconscious intention.  We need to ask ourselves "What do I want?" and limit ourselves to one desired outcome - state it aloud and let it sit with you, feel it, know it, understand it and emit it.  This is what you want to expect, and focus on this to make it happen.  Our perception of our outcome makes a huge difference to our outcome" 
~ ADAM

(Reference: Intention Heals ~ a guide and workbook ~ ADAM, Author of DreamHealer)