" Shake It Off ... "

But I keep cruising, can't stop, won't stop moving

It's like I got this music in my body and it's gonna be alright

'Cause the players gonna play, play, play, play, play

And the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate ... 

Heartbreakers gonna break, break, break, break, break

And the fakers gonna fake, fake, fake, fake, fake

Baby, I'm just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake

I shake it off, I shake it off

I'll never miss a beat, I'm lightning on my feet

And that's what they don't see mmm, that's what they don't see mmm ... 

I, I shake it off, I shake it off

~ Taylor Swift ~ Shake It Off ~

***

When you feel no need to defend your thoughts, opinions, or ideas, you can deal with life knowing that you are empowered, your faith is strong, and you are able to shake “it” off.  

Faith comes from our own ability to recognize the influence the world has around us actually comes from within us.  Rather than being driven to prove our place, we become confidant in our actions, behaviours and words.  So when life events occur, we tap into that place to manage, cope and deal.

The need to engage in confrontations or conflict, and trying to defend ourselves is no longer required.  We have confidence in the moment and secure with our personal power.  

We don’t feel the need to be right, or teach a lesson, or point out a mistake, or preach.  We learn that every one has their own journey full of successes and failures to experience.  We learn that we are in no position to judge, unless we open ourselves up to be judged.  We learn loving compassion and kindness for those that disagree with our point of view.  We find that people can have different opinions, but still respect one another.  And we learn that the we have very little control of an outcome.

For those whom don’t resonate with these ideas, subconsciously we all demonstrate faith, daily ... if we are blessed to live another day.  When catastrophes happen, we don’t fall apart, even if we think we may.  We are only as strong as we allow ourselves to be and what we believe will manifest ...

Personally, I started with developing a trustworthiness of the Universe.  I opened my mind and heart to the possibility of anything.  I detached myself from the outcome, and began to take notice along the way.  And I freed myself of others through forgiveness and listened to my heart’s deep desire.  I realized that no one is perfect and expecting myself and others to live up to a fictitious standard results in suffering.  

By living each day in a state of unshakable faith, it grows to support me when facing predicaments ... it is a practice, a practice of gratitude for what is and appreciation for whatever comes.  When you find yourself fully immersed in this space, faith is ... unshakable ... 

www.walkstrong.ca

" Blame ... "

When you're willing to render 

To the guilt you concede 

When truth is your reason 

Then lay that blame on me 

When you unveil a conscience 

And with peace you agree 

When love is your constant 

Then lay that blame on me ...

Question your answers 

Truth has no anger 

Gather up your words 

Redemption now offered

~ Collective Soul ~ Blame ~

***

Raise your hand if you played victim today and placed blame for your circumstances ... c’mon we all do it and we do it often.  Why? ... because it allows us to feel like life is controlling us instead of us controlling life ... because it really buys us time before we are ready to take responsibility for our lives.

But before we take “response - ability” we have to understand the difference between control and influence.  For example, you can influence a loved ones decision but you cannot control their ultimate choice.  

When we take too much responsibility, we tend to blame ourselves when things go wrong.  And we also tend to not take credit when things work out well.  It is crucial to understand where personal responsibility lies and the ability to do something about it.  

...

Use what does or does not happen in your life as a “tool” 

for moving through obstacles, providing motivation and taking positive action

...

I am learning to stop trying to punish myself or others for what appears to be mistakes 

... 

I am learning to focus my energy on realistic solutions instead 

...

Recently I read that there is a “six-step process” for dissolving blame:

• How am I blaming myself or others for what is happening in my life?
• Could I welcome whatever thoughts or feelings that brings up inside of me?
• Could I let that go?
• Would I let that go?
• When?
• Can I let go of wanting to blame myself or others for what happens and love what is as best I can?

Oddly, our minds may resist letting go of blame because we don’t want to let anyone off the hook.  Yet we all know that holding onto blame leads to the same patterns and suffering.

The idea is to live beyond blame.  

This means replacing “fault” with “action” or taking responsibility while letting go of blame.  You will find that taking appropriate steps from moment to moment, allows life to simply unfold as it does.  This frees up all that energy you have been using ... simply by un clutching, letting go and allowing.  We can then look for the highest good and create that in our lives and in the lives of others in our world, truly taking “response-ability”, beyond blame.

" What Happens Tomorrow ... "

You've got to believe 

it'll be alright in the end 

Fighting, because we're so close 

There are times we punish those who we need the most 

No, we can't wait for a saviour 

Only got ourselves to blame for this behaviour

And nobody knows what's gonna happen tomorrow 

~ Duran Duran ~ What Happens Tomorrow ~

***

How do you define motivation?  Is it what makes things happen?  Without it, is there any desire or drive to accomplish or create?  Once I understood what was moving me in one direction or holding me back in another, I started to understand my motivation triggers.  And started to make things happen.  For me, motivation affects everything I do and every choice I make. 

We usually can slot into one of the below motivation types ...

Achievement ... pursuing & attaining goals ... this kind can be combined with the drive to be good at something.  Achievement motivated people like work, responsibility and take pride in solving problems.  

Affiliation ... strong desire for love and acceptance ... there is a drive to relate to people on a social basis.  Having a support system is crucial.  Compliments, good attitude and cooperation are valued.

Security ... essentially a deep concern for the future.  The feeling that accumulating money and material possessions eases and shelters the pathway to the future.  Change and risk-taking is stressful.  Having steady work and dependable income is comfort.

Nuture ... need to give support, help, service and gifts to others with no strings attached.  Important factor is knowing you are lending comfort or a listening ear.  This is associated with the ability to empathize and respond to the needs of others.

Fear ... often imposed from an external source.  Creates worry and stress.  Internally, the feeling of need for change, due to pain and fear of remaining in a situation is often a catalyst for this type.

Power and Influence ... intensely driven to put in an extra effort to accomplish goals for this promise.  Competition with others is evident.  Influence, leadership, desire to control and responsibility for others are by-products of a power position.  Positively, results are achieved, negatively, power used for personal aggrandizement.

So what motivates you? Unlocking your motivation type(s) can help you understand your personal values ... what truly energies and excites you.  Once you know what these values are, then you can plan your goals around them.  If you are still unsure, study the some of the most successful people.  They understand what their values are and live their lives in accordance with them.  

You’d be surprised how many of us though, live our lives according to other people’s values. We end up devoting a large amount of time to things that genuinely don’t matter to us which results in those feelings of de-motivation & sluggishness. 

Some of my personal values are health, innovation, learning and insight, fun and adventure.  I make a concerted effort to ensure I am factoring in these values every day in some way.  I am careful not to confuse my values with ‘pleasurable activities’ ... values are not always about instant gratification – but they assist you to grow as a person in the long run.

“Never let the things that matter to you most be at the mercy of those that do not”