Tuesday, September 2, 2014

" Temper Temper ... "

This time you'd better bite your tongue
Think twice before you open that mouth
Take a breath, hold it in your lungs
Being from rage, will it overcome?

I feel the tension rising high
I feel a hump down in my chest
Nothing is strange, I see in red
Can't hold it back
Here comes my...

Temper temper, time to explode
Feels good when I lose control
Temper temper, time to explode
Chamber's empty, time to reload

~ Bullet For My Valentine ~ Temper Temper ~

So you think that temper tantrums only apply to children?  Well I just proved otherwise ... today.  Yeah, not a proud moment I might add.  Downright embarrassing to be honest.  And I know that I am not alone ... 

You see as a child when I threw a tantrum, my Mother wouldn’t wait patiently until I calmed down.  She would confront me upfront and in a stern, no nonsense voice of imposing authority, inform me that there was no way she was going to up with my drama act.  I could scream, stomp and even body-slam fits of rage, she would have none of it.  And I love her for it.  Because she knew, as a toddler, I wasn’t a master in effectively communicating my feelings or solving problems.

Sure needed that no nonsense tone today ...

Okay, rather than beating myself up for the entire day, I get that anger manifests when the demands we place on ourselves, others or on the world are not being met to our expectations.  So the question is ... are my expectations realistic and fair?  

We are conditioned by society to believe that we should have what we want when we want it, that we deserve only the best and should not deny ourselves, and that we shouldn't have to work hard to obtain possessions, success, health, or love.  So we carry on with life, trying to find quick fixes for every possible need.  And when life doesn’t go as planned (almost always), our inner child may ... ahem, bloom.

So I check my ego and ask ... do I consider myself more important than others (no) ... do I feel my rights trump yours (no) ... are my needs greater than the other person at this moment (no) ... 

darn, sadly no excuse for bad behaviour ... i’m sorry

I am realizing that when we are denied what we are seeking, personal and spiritual growth have a chance, because it enables us to prioritize what is really important.

I know better ... I have better tools ... I know I can learn from this ...
Do no harm ...

Letting your raw emotions out is important so they won’t leak into the rest of your life ... as long as you project to an inanimate object.  Dealing with anger effectively, in the moment, is golden.  The key is finding a safer way to deal with it,  allowing a full release, without making an a$$ in the process.

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