Friday, June 7, 2013

" Guilty ... "

I swear to tell the truth
The whole truth and nothing but the truth
I said
Right hand high, tell a lie ...

Lets go
Right hand to the sky
Strike me down if I lie ...
Should have let me be

I'm balling against the law shorty go on arrest me then ...
Tired of your little games, I take the blame
I did it, guilty.

~ Usher ~ Guilty ~

We can be sure that there is nothing we can do to change the past.  Life is all about making decisions, taking risks and remembering what doesn’t work ... in our attempt to find out what does.  So why then do we continue to dwell on our mistakes, feel guilty so that we can feel guilty?

Well it seems that each generation has taken on guilt and then passed it down to their children.  Humans have used guilt for behaviour modification, punishment and revenge.  Guilt is so much a part of our culture, like a plague, causing pain, suffering and despair.  

Life doesn’t run smoothly and we don’t live in a perfect world ... combine that with not accepting reality.  We hope for a better change to how things should be, only to constantly disappointed.  Acceptance breeds understanding and not guilt.

Guilt is a foreign substance that tags along on our emotions like an infection.  And therefore doesn’t allow the natural flow to occur within us.  We feel the feeling and then it’s gone ... leaving a space for another ... but with guilt, we get stuck and hurt.  

Anger without guilt feels like power ...
Fear without guilt feels like anticipation ...

Remember a good conscience does not depend on guilt but rather on a self-assured sense of what is right and wrong.  Guilt erodes conscience by degrading self-esteem and even causing self-hatred.  Guilt makes us feel obliged to prove just how bad we are.  

Think back to a situation that makes you feel guilty and now realistically look at the situation you were in at the time, how much you knew, your circumstances, your state of health and ask if you could have done things any better ... because when you know better you do better.

And if someone is using their own insecurities to make you feel guilty, ask if they are justified ... no one is perfect so accept and work with the imperfections rather than pretending they don’t exist.

“When it is in us, it is guilt. When it is in someone else, it is blame. Guilt we feel impossible to own ourselves becomes blame when it is projected out onto another ... “

Real healing comes when guilt is confronted and removed ... releasing the judgements that confine us.  We are here to learn, trial and error, a part of growing and evolving.  Believe mistakes are feedback.

“The secret is simply to decide again ... 
take back your original judgement, 
change your mind, un-decide, un-judge ...”

Every choice we make is valid when used as a learning experience.  So when you release judgement you are free to decide again about how you will feel and act in a similar situation ... and you are free to let go of what was and look forward to what can be.

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