" Ahead Of The Curve ... "

I had shoes to fill

Walking barefoot now

Can't tell north from south

But no split hair's gonna get me down, no

I'm stayin' above the flat line

And I'm ahead of the curve

Take a piece of the sunshine with me

On a red-eye flight to another world

~ Ahead Of The Curve ~ Monsters of Folk ~

***

Life throws you so many curveballs when you least expect it.  One day can be almost perfect and another day leaving you wondering where you went wrong.  Wouldn’t it be nice if life had a pause button?

I will say it is easier to block out everything that makes the world not seem like the great, fantastic place I want it to be.  Hide from the bad stuff because I just want the good parts.  I wasn’t sure if I was strong enough to take it on ... turns out, I am stronger than I gave myself credit for. 

The never-ending struggle of knowing things that I actually have control over and those of which I cannot change.  The wisdom part is what I struggle with the most ... knowing when to keep going and when to stop.  Knowing the difference is a life-long process.  And through these distressful moments, I strive to be braver than the times before, armed with courage.  I realize that there are times for me to just close my eyes and let everything go.   I need to let the Him have control ... believing that the greatests lessons are given to his best students.

Without a doubt, having a balanced relationship with Russell has allowed us to tackle most issues together.  We trust that each other is looking out for the other.  Individually we are strong, yet combined has made us a force ready for anything.  Every step in unison ... I realized that if we can deal with cancer, we can really deal with anything that comes our way. 

No matter what we may be going through, there is always beauty that surrounds us each and every day ... remembering to find it and take some time out to savor it, even briefly.  I believe this beauty has a positive energy and vibe that we can tap into when we need to... to recharge ourselves in the midst of a difficult situation and replace negativity with the healthier alternative.

Nothing is always perfect and I believe there is a greater plan in play.  I can be the one who decides how full or empty my glass is while life continues to throw these curveballs ... choosing to hit it right out of the park.

" Respect ... "

I ain't gonna do you wrong while you're gone

Ain't gonna do you wrong (oo) 'cause I don't wanna (oo)

All I'm askin' (oo)

Is for a little respect when you come home (just a little bit)

Baby (just a little bit) when you get home (just a little bit)

Yeah (just a little bit)

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

Find out what it means to me

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

Take care, TCB

~ Aretha Franklin ~ Respect ~

***

Lately the topic of respect seems to be surfacing in conversations around me ... mutual respect, lack of respect, and disrespect within relationships.  All types of relationships too.  And yes It is true that all relationships are different, yet despite their differences, one essential element makes all relationships work in a healthy way for both paties ... RESPECT.  Putting up with disrespectful behaviour for fear of losing someone as a partner or friend is destructive to self-worth, but people often let this happen.  Why?  well they don’t know how to identify signs of disrespect.  And without respect, no true friendship can take root.  

Here are some signs that will red flag if you are in the midst of an unhealthy situation:

• Trust - A perfectly normal emotion felt by people in relationships is jealousy, but the issue is how the person reacts or deals with these feelings.  When one person doesnt’ trust the other to enjoy other friendships, trust is lacking.  Healthy connections allow everyone to maintain their own identities and do things independently of the other person, free of suspicion.   

• Honesty - This is fundamental to respectful, trusting relationships.  Being honest and openly communicating thoughts and feelings make your relationship stronger.  Being nonjudgemental, accepting and valuing each other’s opinions, beliefs and feelings.  Signs that respect is lacking include lying and situations in which one party belittles or is intolerant of the other for feeling or thinking a certain way.

• Fairness and Equality - This involves balance, and requires give and take from both sides ... this can be lacking when one person consistently excludes the other from decision making.  Also when one person is forced to compromise to satisfy the other, respect is lacking.

• Mutual Support - Being present when times are good AND bad.  A respectful relationship is a partnership in which people work together to achieve common goals as well as support each other when things get tough.  If you can’t count on them during these challenging times, these are signs of respect deficienty in the relationship.

We all have experiences we can share with each other when it comes to relationships.  We live and learn.  Remember to choose your relationships wisely and be the kind of person you want in return.  Lead by example.  And as hard as it may be, confront those who show you disrespect.  If you have someone whose level of respect does not meet your expectations and they refuse to consider your feelings, you must be willing to distance yourself from them.  

Seek those whom are more likely to pull you up then push you down ...