And human behaviour
Be ready to get confused
There's definitely no logic
There's no map
To human behaviour
They're terribly moody
Then all of a sudden turn happy ..."
~ Bjork ~ Human Behaviour ~
Do you ever have some of those moments when you scratch your head and wonder about some people, like WTH? Yeah, I know common sense is not that common. I guess where my confusion lies in general human behaviour. The moodiness of humans, how they can be sweet as pie to one person, and turn around and be quite nasty ... all in a split second. Hmmmm maybe a split personality? And in the instance I am referring to, names are not important, really, because all I think is, "Really?!? you have SO much more to be concerned with ..." but the gosh honest truth is that it still confuses me.
And I still just don't get it.
You see with this individual, we are connected, albeit more recently, due to circumstances. And I extended my hand, provided a shoulder to cry on even when mine where not strong enough for me ... and in turn, I have got very little compassion, concern or care. I guess I figured because we are in the same predicament that maybe just maybe we would have a connection. But I guess when you assume you make an .... well you know the saying. Yet the beauty of this situation is .....I started to recognize that this is a situation I have had in my life before and you may be reading this and identify with this. In the past, my reaction has been hurt, anger and wanting to project that back to them.
Well, not this time. No, not this time.
This time around, I send blessings and love to them. I hope that their sort things out for themselves, on their own time, because really there must be a whole lotta going on in their head, things they need to sort out and not for me to take on. Because when we take things personally, assume that it must be "me", it's our ego taking over. Their life doesn't revolve around you. And the more energy we put into figuring it out, discussing it to the ninth degree, and super analyzing, we drain ourselves of so much goodness we hold.
I decided to replace my fear, where hurt and anger stem from, with gratitude. And life presents us with amazing opportunities to practice what we learn. Lessons learned ... now thats not saying that it's easy, but the next time you feel slighted, used, hurt, or angry, recognize it, make a little room for it and then let it go .... moving it aside. Then we can think about all the things we are grateful for. If anything, it is a great distraction from the current situation, and once you turn back to what was bothering you, the intensity of the situation subsides. For me, I write and write ... as I have said it is therapeutic ... and blogging is like "dear diary" but with an audience! Afterwards I let out a *sigh of relief and again scratch my head and ask myself ... hmmm, what was it I was so confused about again?!?"