" Cowards … "

I blame myself for never saying anything.

You're dead to me,

but I'm the fool who still believes

that one day you'll actually see

that you missed out on everything.

My innocence you devoured,

you ------ coward!

I'm finding faith in myself tonight

and finally, I got it right.

I must forgive you to move on.

It's my only choice;

cause' you'll never come

to fill up all the cracks in this foundation.

You're the fear, all the panic and shame.

I'm afraid I'll be like you one day.

I'd love to hear the things you tell yourself

to pass the blame.

~ Senses Fail ~ Cowards ~

***

Warning: this one is going to be a bit of a rant ... 

I don’t have cable.  I don’t have satellite TV.  I indulge in social media sites daily.  I keep up with the world through the media apps on my phone.  I  enjoy from viewing friends on Facebook, and following various publications and websites on twitter.  

This information is available, with ease, on my time.

Well, all of the information ... and the drama.  Yes the drama.  The kind that allows you to hide behind whatever they can find in order to avoid face-to-face confrontation.  

What happened to the days when you walked up to the person you had a problem with and sorted it out?  What happened to courage and maturity?

And no, I am not really fond of confrontation ... who is?  I mean there are times has been times that I’ve kept my thoughts to myself, only to channel my inner bitch towards someone else.  

Not cool.  Not going to happen anymore ...

As an adult, are we not able to handle our issues, by our self, in the most respectful way?  Can we not treat another human being they way we would like to be treated?Well, sadly, not everyone has the same philosophy.  Within the past three years, I have dealt with some ... “interesting” situations ... some personal, some professional ... same commonality ... COWARDS.  

Today, people can type up letters, send emails, post status and instant message others to tell them their feelings that they are not prepared to discuss in-human.  They make excuses, hide their heads in the sand, lie, blame others and generally take the easy way out.  But all actions have consequences, and so does LACK of action ... how you treat others is a direct reflection on YOU and not them.  

The worst thing about being lied to 

is knowing you weren’t worth the truth to them …

So here it is ... if you have a problem with me and cannot handle coming to me to tell me, it really isn't worth discussing at all.  It must not be serious enough if you are unable to tell me with your mouth and not a machine.  Because if you have the courage to start the drama, at least find the gumption to continue it when the target of your slander ends up being more mature than you.

www.walkstrong.ca

" Justify My Love ... "

What are you gonna do?

What are you gonna do?

Talk to me - tell me your dreams

Am I in them?

Tell me your fears

Are you scared?

Tell me your stories

I'm not afraid of who you are

We can fly!

I'm open and ready

For you to justify my love

To justify my love

Wanting, to justify

Waiting, to justify my love

Praying, to justify

To justify my love

I'm open, to justify my love

~ Madonna ~ Justify My Love ~

***

How many times have you heard someone who has said or done something that is hurtful justify it by saying the recipient left them no other choice?  

Chances are you have crossed a line if you’re justifying behaviour ... because something deep inside might be sensing that it’s gone from enjoyment to dependence.  Sound familiar? ... yeah we’ve all been there, but the thing is that it only lasts for so long.  In your core, you know what is right and what is pushing it.  Perhaps just an example of using blame to excuse your own bad behaviour.

And really what IS the big deal?  Well, blame is like anger, it dulls our sense of empathy.  It gives us permission to act in a hurtful way to others since it removes the inhibitions ordinary humans have that serve as a buffer against what we know is destructive behaviour.  When we justify, we allow our emotions to take over our self-control in order to achieve a selfish end.

Blame is a defensive to protect our philosophy, emotions and ego ...

Blaming behaviour and selfish behaviour work together.  How?  well, if there some emotional benefit, comfort, entertainment or psychological stability, the actions will continue to consume  you ... as long as things work out for the blamer.

And when there are unintended consequences, instead of taking responsibility for one self’s actions, the blamer begins to find reasons why they should be excused from the repercussions they don’t feel they deserve.

When we blame others we overemphasize ourselves 

and under emphasize the negative effects of our actions ... 

we gain something pleasurable and avoid something unpleasant.

So where do you draw the line?  That’s up to you to decide.  Yet pretending like your actions don’t have consequences, and staying within your comfort level so it benefit’s you, again you decide if that is selfish or protection.  Your morals, your choices, your life ...

We surround ourselves with people that think and act as we do.  Yet sometimes we may need to check in with outside of our circle ... and get an objective opinion.  We may not like what we hear but this critical perspective let’s us know how we are being perceived and therefore how we will be treated.

And really you may not care what others think of you ... but if asking yourself “what would I lose if I did allow myself to see what I don't want to see?” makes you a wee bit curious, then maybe you really do want to know ...