Thursday, July 28, 2011

"Not givin' up ..."

"Are you looking for a way out? 
Are you looking for an exit?
It seems like all the fuss you're making
Is a sign that you're not quite sure

... I'm not giving up, no "
~ Natasha Bedingfield ~ Not Givin' Up"

After blogging about my birthday, last weekend and confessing, I have had feelings of giving up.  Yeah, I know me, Ms. Sunshine here all positive and peaceful having feelings of just "whats the use?".  There are many factors and events that have triggered these feelings and out of respect and privacy to my friends, I will keep those details to myself.  But what I can tell you, that when you are at a place of giving up, it is very dark.  And very lonely.  But you have to pull yourself up, and even though I have amazing family and friends around me, it is really up to YOU, and only you.  You have to decide if it is worth it ... and yes, thankfully, I have realized it is.  I blog a great deal on the blessings in my life and the opportunities that cancer has given me.  Yet day to day, this is hard, well actually brutally hard.  And I don't think any treatment would be.  Regardless of how you go about it, the fear and uncertainty can be overwhelming.  I see it in others eyes as they just get really quiet when I tell them what I am dealing with and what treatment I am in.  Would I like to be definitive and give a resounding YES this is working and YES I am healing and YES I will be cured ... of course!!  But again, what do we really know?  Just the present and every moment when the fear starts to take over, I tell myself that over and over ... the present is what you truly know so enjoy it.

So the harder you fall the higher bounce right? Let's just say, I bounced real hard lately.  
And during this process I found some reasons why to never, never give up.  My plan now, is to post this up in clear view just in case ;)

"1. As Long As You Are Alive Anything Is Possible
The only valid excuse you have to give up is if you are dead. As long as you are alive (and healthy and free) you have the choice to keep trying until you finally succeed.

2. Be Realistic
The chance of mastering something the first time you do it is almost non-existent. Everything takes time to learn and you will make mistakes. Learn from them.

3. Lance Armstrong
Lance was diagnosed with serious cancer that had spread throughout his entire body. He had cancer cells the size of golf balls in his lungs. Despite all odds he overcame the cancer and set out to win the Tour de France 6 Consecutive years in a row.

4. You Are Strong 
You are stronger than you think. One little setback is not enough to stop you from achieving your goals. Neither are 10 or 100 or 1000 setbacks.

5. Prove Yourself
You don’t want to be known as someone that is weak and gives up. Go out there and prove yourself to the world and to yourself. You CAN and WILL achieve what you set out to do. The only time you fail is when you give up.

6. Believe In Your Dreams
Don’t sell yourself short. In life there are going to be many people who will try to bring you down and tell you what you want to achieve is not possible. Don’t let anyone destroy your dreams.

7. Your Family and Friends.
Let the people you love and who mean the world to you be your inspiration to persist and persevere. Maybe you need to try a different angle, study more or practice more but don’t give up!

8. Improve Our World
When you achieve whatever you set out to achieve you can use your success to make a difference to the world or other peoples lives.

9. Inspire Others
Be an inspiration to others by refusing to give up. Who knows what someone else can achieve because you never gave up and in turn inspired them not to give up.

10. You Deserve To Be Happy
Don’t ever let anybody tell you otherwise. You deserve to be happy and you deserve to have success. Keep that mindset and never give up until you reach your destination"


  1. It can be difficult to stay strong, especially when the program you are on is so different than your previous lifestyle. I've been doing this (cancer not gerson) for 7 years now and fallen off the wagon so to speak more than once. But you know what, you just get your butt back up, remember people love you, and in the scheme of things stressing over eating that piece of chocolate or skipping one of your enemas or missing a dose of supplement is more harmful than just acknowledging it happening, being thankful, and kicking butt the next day. It's not giving up, it's just taking a mental break, and than you start back up again.

  2. Shanna, I am inspired by you and your journey ... 7 years wow my friend that is unbelievable. I agree at times it is just a mental break and you just get up and try again. With the intensity of Gerson, there are days I just want one day off ... but I know that my body is healing and that every moment counts and I just continue on. The love and support around me is amazing and I will never give up ... it's just not an option ~ sending you love and blessings xoxo

  3. It is hard sometimes, ok, its hard most times but it will be worth it, just hang on. I too have had the days of "I can do this anymore" and then I look my grandchildren in the eyes and think, it is worth it, to keep trying and not to give up. Better days are coming Meena, I promise you. I am sending you this song again.

    Here is the song: War of my Life by John Mayer

    Fight on!

  4. Hi Mini, your blogs recently have been so brutally honest and hard that I just want to reach out across the miles to hug you and encourage you. I know you have plenty of people around you to be your strength but I can also understand that sense of loneliness that you expressed.... and at times my spirit just groans for you before God. I also encourage you to stand strong but sometimes in standing we need the help of others to hold us up. A verse that helped me a lot as I struggled with my self worth over the years is from Psalm 139: 13-16, the whole psalm is awesome but that part helped keep me strong. Your remain in my prayers and thoughts. Fiona

  5. Your love and support are amazing - thank-you Theresa for your continuous encouragement...we are getting thru this moment by moment. As you say, we continue to fight on thru these horrid diseases.

    Fiona, I too wish that you were here ~ thank-you for your continuous kind words. I hope that I have that opportunity sooner than later to take you up on that hug. Sending love to you, Peter, Nicole and Ryan.

  6. “If ever there is tomorrow when we're not together.. there is something you must always remember. you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. but the most important thing is, even if we're apart.. i'll always be with you.” --Winne the pooh----

    So don't give up! You are loved.

    Theresa <3