" Say My Name ... "

Say my name, say my name 

If no one is around you 

Say baby I love you 

If you ain't runnin' game 

Say my name, say my name ... 

Why the sudden change 

I know you say that i am assuming things 

Something's going down thats the way it seems 

Shouldn't be the reason why you're acting strange 

If nobody's holding you back from me 

Cause I know how you useually do 

When you say everything to me times two 

Why can't you just tell the truth 

If somebody's there then tell me who 

Why the sudden change 

~ Destiny’s Child ~ Say My Name ~

***

Those who know me wonder why I have “two” names.  Is it Meena or is it Mini?  And why the two?  

Until recently I use to say that “Mini didn’t seem professional enough, so I changed it to Meena.  Meena is what they know me as in the workplace.  It has a nice ring to it ... blah blah blah ...”.  And I would of course add the story of where the name “Mini” came from ... which is a funny story for another blog.  

But again, the above was the explanation I use to give.  And yes it is all true, but there was more to it.  And now I can share what that is, because now, a huge realization set in for me.  

I changed my name after years of teasing ... I use to hear Mini Mouse, Mini Ravioli, and even are you a Mini or a Maxi ... yeah that one was very odd.  But I also changed my name because I never really liked who I was, I never really liked Mini.  I felt inadequate and un-worthy.  I didn’t feel like I was good enough, for anything.  I just didn’t like Mini.  So this was enough motivation to change my name, because maybe it would change me.  I could be someone else because I didn’t want the life I had, I wanted to be someone else, almost always.

But things have shifted.  And my friends may have noticed that even on facebook, I added Mini to my name.  I kept both only because I built an entire life around Meena, just like I had an entire life around Mini.

So what the change, again?  Well, I had a great conversation with a friend who asked me if I had found the blessing(s) in cancer.  And I said yes I had and there were many.  The biggest one is “now, love who I am”.  I have discovered self-love and it feels great.  I am in  alignment with my thoughts, my actions and my feelings.  I feel worthy, I feel adequate and I know I am doing the best I can with where I am at right now, exactly where I am suppose to be.

Well, there you have it ... and it may seem odd, but that’s okay, because I am good with odd too!  

Yes you can ask the question ... “what name do you prefer then?”.  Honestly, I prefer that you call me by the name you feel comfortable with, as YOU know me and who I am.  Because TADA! .... “it’s ME!”.  

Truly, a name is just a name, a label ... but it is the essence of a being, their presence and their actions who determine who they really are.  Their authentic self ... and at my core, I was and still am the same person.

“Bob Marley isn’t my name.  I don’t even know my name yet.”

~ Bob Marley ~

" Your Word ... "

Your Word I can't deny Your truth
It covers me and lights the way ahead
Your ways of mercy never end
My life surrounded by the hope within
You’ve placed a fire within my heart
Awakening desire for You ...

I stand upon the things You said
My trust in You and by Your Word I live
I know that You have rescued me
My way is set Your light will lead me on
Follow follow follow follow You

~ Parachute Club ~ Your Word ~

***

You’ve probably heard the saying “walk your talk” meaning say what you mean and mean what you say ... the path of personal integrity.  But do you find that your words take you down a path you are not willing to follow?  And do you really know where you stand?

You see most of us have good intentions to follow through but lack of skills, energy or even emotional roadblocks get in the way.  Which provides a solid explanation ... but what if we simply don’t keep our word - we over commit and under deliver.  

Maybe the real question is how good are you to your word?

There is great power in words.  They manifest our dreams and goals while holding personal integrity in delicate balance.  They put power into our physical reality.  Having principles and standards consistent throughout all parts of us is integrity.  You see integrity comes from a place of wholeness where think, speak and act are all in alignment.  Our words match our actions ... at least that is the "perfect" definition of it.

We can all reflect on a time when someone in our life used language carelessly and agreed to things readily yet lacked in the action to support it.  These are times when people deprive themselves of their power, because it is diminished when they undermine their own integrity.

So why the deception?  Well it helps to create multiple realities.  You see when you lie, reality splits or “dis-integrate”.  Now you have one reality that you know and live in, and another that the people to whom you have lied live in.  And those whom you have lied make decisions and choices based on the reality they inhabit, but it’s a different reality than the one you inhabit ... resulting in a split which now influences your relationship and your common future.

So why again why the deception?  ... essentially to make your reality more comfortable.  When you lie, you avoid feeling bad or disappointing others.  Yet you create a situation without having any real way of knowing what the repercussions of that reality split will be down road.  You can’t know how this separate reality will boomerang back to you ... and you can’t really know whether the net outcome for this other person will be better or worse than the course of the reality that might have resulted if you had told the truth.  All you can know for sure is that you’ve now created a rift in a continuum of both your own and these other people’s lives, and you’ve taken charge, if even in a small way, of designing someone else’s reality.

I remember being told when you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember any stories because the state of being connected, sound, and consistent are aligned.  You don’t feel fractured wondering when multiple realities may come crashing down.  When you tell the truth you fully know and trust yourself and others trust you.

Many sources on integrity begin with being true to your word.  The truth is that your word is gold.  To speak something other than your highest choice and truth is a form of fragmentation.  We have the ability to use the power of our words in a direction of truth and love.  And this may not necessarily be kind ... but that is when you ask is it coming from a place of compassion for a greater good. ~ Miguel Ruiz

We can all pause to see where we stand.  We can ask what type of agreements are we making or breaking with ourselves?  Begin with choice words that reflect real promises and understand that they hold incredible power towards manifestation.  Because when your words match you intentions and your actions match your words, life is much happier, it feels right and all is in perfect alignment.