“ ... I feel like I'm walking a tight rope, without a circus net
I pray that god answers, maybe I'll ask nicer
That's Rock Bottom
When you feel like you've had it up to here
'Cause you're mad enough to scream but you're sad enough to tear ... “
~ Eminem ~ Rock Bottom ~
You are walking into the ocean and big wave comes and knocks you over. You find yourself lying on the bottom, with sand in your face. Gasping, drowning, searching for a way. And you have a choice ... you keep lying on the bottom or stand up and start to keep walking out to sea.
It is easier to keep lying on the bottom because you know that there is another big wave approaching, possibly to knock you down further. And so you ask yourself, do you want to live? There is something within you, that answers YES ... and in that moment when you decide to cultivate courage and bravery ... humour arises. Because you realize that the waves never stop coming but they may seem to get smaller. You realize that you may just need float on your back rather than swim against the current.
There is a softness and vulnerability that emerges during this time, with your best qualities come out of suffering. When these things happen in our life, and we choose to get up, and keep walking out to the sea, we are not shielding ourselves. We are not guarding ourselves. We are real.
And so ... walking out to sea, that same wave keeps knocking me down. Falling face forward, with sand in my mouth, I get up, again ... I realize how tired I am but also that the waves may not be smaller, but my ability to swim or ride gets better.