“ … And the night goes by so very slow
Oh I hope that it won't end though
But the secret is still my own
Till now I always got by on my own
I never really cared until I met you
And now it chills me to the bone
Alone, alone … “
~ Heart ~ Alone ~
The origin of the word ALONE comes from the Middle East in around the 1300s, from al all + one one. The word itself can be viewed as all one rather than the sad reference it has today.
Being alone doesn’t mean you are anti-social or unwanted ... some sorry state that is colorless unless reinforced by others … implying the sadness, isolation and longing for companionship. Rather, being alone begins with embracing solitude.
We recognize the benefits and joys within fulfilling relationships with other people, yet on your own, you begin to grow as a person. You get a chance to recharge and you get a chance to reflect more. As we spend time by ourselves, we don’t have to bother with processing the thoughts and feelings of others. It is a time when we focus inwards.
… solitude provides the perfect environment for reflection …
And as we focus inwards, we have a chance to get in touch with our own emotions to gain a greater perspective. Plus create a deeper understanding of what makes us happy and what we really want.
With this awareness of what you want, you may start doing thing you actually enjoy as well as become more productive with less distractions. You may even have a sense of independence, confidence in your ability to actually be alone. The anxiety or burning desire for others begins to fade … and you get some distance from constantly trying to keep other people happy … simply, that constant interaction is not required.
When we consider the most important relationship is with one self, we must be happy to give happiness to others. Otherwise we are depleted, drained and have nothing really valuable to offer. This internal new found happiness has always been within us. Alone time or solitude allows us gain access to it and to not be concerned with validation or approval. So as we begin a journey of self discovery, we learn to be okay as we are, on our own or if we prefer with others. That interaction becomes a choice not an obligation or burden, where we can reveal who we really are.