" Broken Wings ... "

Take these broken wings
And learn to fly again, learn to live so free
When we hear the voices sing
The book of love will open up and let us in
Take these broken wings

Let us in
Let us in

Take these broken wings
You got to learn to fly, learn to live and love so free
When we hear the voices sing
The book of love will open up for us and let us in
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, ooh

~ Mr. Mister ~ Broken Wings ~

***

Ever wonder about the life cycle of a butterfly? ... The butterfly doesn’t start out looking like its final form.  During the transformation process or growth, it looks nothing like the final intended form of its design ... sometimes our life is like that too.

We hope life will be colourful and vibrant like the butterfly but sometimes all we can see are larva and caterpillars.  And sometimes the wait seems so very long.  So if life isn’t what you had hoped it would be perhaps your process of transformation isn’t yet complete?  

Watching butterflies ~ splash of beauty gently dancing ...

Nature teaches ...

“the caterpillar struggles to destinations and tries not to get stepped upon along the way.  But upon the moment it enters solidarity it is confined to itself; facing what it is and then forced to endure the painful process of becoming something better and more beautiful.  As it is reborn it tests its wings and flies gently away, so all that you see is a splash of color passing by.  It sees the world through the eyes of a new creature and it know not where it is going, for when you can fly your journey is endless.”

I knew that the butterfly meant something significant in my own personal quest to grow and develop physically, emotionally, intellectually and spiritually ... and at times, I ponder if I am becoming the butterfly that will eventually emerge and quietly take flight??

If we apply this analogy beyond our own personal lives to mankind as a whole, the butterfly represents the new world where we will have a topia society of peace and abundance.  The chrysalis represents the pressure and limitations put upon any creativity that might help us evolve towards that dream.  And the final stage of the butterfly’s metamorphosis is when the chrysalis bursts open from the inside out due to the size of the butterfly.  

The butterfly will become a butterfly because that is exactly what it is naturally designed to do ... similar to people.  If we give ourselves the permission to be what we are truly meant to be and shine within our unique talents, we will become what we are naturally designed to be.  So it is fair to say that whether one chooses to be a limitation, an encouragement or a part of the butterfly, each is crucial to the long-awaited outcome.  And each time we try to fly, if we fail, we try again and again ...

ॐ Practice compassion towards yourself and know that as long as you stay in the process, you are heading towards a beautiful place of completion, even if the journey isn’t pretty ॐ 

" With or Without You ... "

Through the storm we reach the shore

You give it all but I want more

And I'm waiting for you ...

And you give yourself away

And you give yourself away ...

My hands are tied

My body bruised

she's got me with

Nothing to win

Nothing left to lose

With or without you

With or without you

I can't live

With or without you

~ U2 ~ With or Without You ~

***

Yesterday I was blessed to speak with a dear friend of ours.  Charlie.  Russell and I met Charlie and his wife Mary Alice at the clinic last year.  And although it was brief, we shared a great deal with each other and have remained friends ever since.  It is nice knowing I can reach out to others, whom are on the Gerson Therapy, when I really need to.  Yesterday, I was one of those days.

Our conversation was full of many topics and one of them was about fear.  I shared with Charlie the emotional roller coaster I have been experiencing for the past few months.  Mainly triggered by physical healing reactions.  We both agreed that fear has only one purpose ... to debilitate you.  As I continue to share, Charlie keenly listened and then asked me a very direct question ... “what are you afraid of?”.  I really had to think about it.  What AM I afraid of?  I proceeded to answer in a round about way but finally quietly answered ... I am afraid to die.  You see, not many people talk openly about death.  And why would they ... are we not told if we focus on something it will happen?  But the reality is that if we face our fears, maybe we can work through them.  It is not as if I am inviting the concept ... I just plainly stated my fear around it.

Later in the day, I told Russell about my conversation ... and my fear.  Through heavy tears, I told him I feared getting worse not better, I feared becoming completely physically dependent, I feared the disappointment, suffering and pain I would cause him and my family if things didn’t work out.

Calmly, Russell talked to me about my spiritual beliefs around reincarnation ... he reminded me about my strong faith, and how it has carried me through this part of my journey.  Then he asked me to stop worrying about everyone else.  He asked me to focus on what I could do, in this life, for me.  He asked me to continue to share my gifts, my best.  He asked me to continue to live this life with him and enjoy what we have been blessed with.  He gave me perspective.  Perspective I needed.

Sometimes you need a bit more help than affirmations and meditations.  When you just need the allowance to admit your feelings, instead of ignoring them.  You cannot heal what you won’t confront.  I believe earthly angels come into our lives with a purpose ... perhaps to love and guide us when we lose our way, reminding us of the goodness we posses.  

The load feels a bit lighter today, thanks to Charlie and Russell.   

"Patience ..."

"...little patience, mmm yeah, ooh yeah, 
I need a little patience, yeah
Just a little patience, yeah
Some more pati... ence, yeah
I've been walking the streets at night
Just trying to get it right ... 
Need some patience, yeah

I ain't got time for the pain ..."

~Guns N' Roses ~ Patience ~

***

Patience.  An interesting word.  Used in many ways.  Taught from a young age ... we must be patient.  But really it has never been easy to be patient, and probably even harder now than ever.  I can attest to that, currently in a therapy that is recommended for a minimum of 18 months or 78 weeks ... we are on week 34, and always counting...

You see in a world where messages can be sent across the globe instantly, seemingly everything is available with a few clicks of the mouse.  It's very hard not to expect instant satisfaction.  But patience remains a valuable tool in our lives.  We don't always get instant gratification, and some of the best things in life require years of hard work and waiting.  And fortunately, "patience is a virtue" that can be cultivated and nurtured.  Yeah right?  how many times have you heard "I have no patience", or "I just want it now" ... well it is possible.  But it takes time to fulfill this goal ... isn't that ironic?  ... Yet, once you have conquered this, it will become second nature.  And the bonus is that you won't be disappointed at what life can offer you with some spare time.  You will be surprised by how boring, restless and lagging hours can evolve into a passing time of relaxation and peace of mind.

Curious?  yes!  read on ...

(1) Ask why you are in such a hurry?  It appears that we tend to lose our patience when we are multitasking or on a tight schedule, expecting the day to pass within only a few short minutes of busyness and chaos.  If you are stretching yourself too thin, re-do your to-do list before you attempt to change your natural reaction to an overwhelming situation.  Try to do your tasks one at a time, and delegate your responsibilities to share the load. 

(2) Try to recognize the triggers that often influence you to lose your patience.  Impatience is like a slow growth, it creeps up on you.  And if you feel anxious, worried or unhappy you may not even realize the underlying cause of these feelings is impatience.  Raise your awareness ... which events, people, phrases or circumstances trigger you.  At the core of most triggers is a reality that we have a hard time accepting.  But remember to ask yourself, whose realities are these?

(3) Overcome bouts of impatience.  Yes, one of the hardest things to do, but by developing patience, your outlook and attitude about life shifts.  Start by learning how to relax when you feel impatient.  Take a few deep breaths and clear your mind.  Concentrate on breathing and you'll start to get your bearings.

(4) If it is out of your control, let go.  Just let it go.  Easier said than done but it's the only healthy thing you can do.  Practice makes perfect and you will gradually develop the strength to remain patient in the most difficult situations.

(5) Mental note for self ... things take time.  Getting things done now and not wasting time doesn't apply to every situation.  Some things just can't be rushed.  I realize that almost anything really good in life takes time and dedication, and if you're impatient, you're more likely to give up on relationships, goals and other things that are important to you.  

(6) Expect the unexpected.  Ah yes, this has definitely been my journey.  I had plans and last I checked, they didn't include battling cancer.  Life lesson, things don't always work out as planned.  I accept the twist and turns in life ... gracefully.  And I keep my expectations realistic.  This not only applies to my current situation, but also to the behaviour within and around me.

(7) Remember what matters most.  Focusing on what matters most in this life fuels patience.  Move the world toward peace by being kind, generous in forgiveness of others, being grateful for what is, and taking full advantage of what matters most.  Take time to remember any one of these items can reduce our tendency to want something different right now.

(8) Have a positive outlook on life.  Remember that you will eventually get what you want.  Everything works out in the end, for a Higher Purpose.  Yes, this requires maturity and patience to understand and accept.  If you work hard at something, this may be the truth, but most of the time you have to be patient to get what you want.  Our destinations are constantly moving so remember that Life is a journey to be savoured each step of the way.

1. 
   

"Apologize ..."

"I'm holding on your rope, 
Got me ten feet off the ground
I'm hearin what you say but I just can't make a sound
You tell me that you need me 
Then you go and cut me down, but wait
You tell me that you're sorry
Didn't think I'd turn around, and say..."

~ OneRepublic ~ Apologize ~ 

***

My last post I talked about the Five Love Languages.  After more researching, I found that there are Five Languages of Apology.  How IMPORTANT is this considering since we have become experts in wronging each other.  When we blame others, we give up our power and when we give up our power, there is little to no chance of resolution.  Saying I'm sorry isn't just a matter of will, it is a matter of how we say sorry.

So what makes up how we say we are sorry?  Well, the Five Languages of Apology are: Expressing Regret, Accepting Responsibility, Making Restitution, Genuinely Repent, and Requesting Forgiveness.  

Expressing Regret

The admission of guilt and shame for the pain we have caused someone else.  For some, the words "I'm sorry" is all they need to accept the apology.  It is direct, requires no other action and doesn't try to deflect blame.  It is a powerful language when used authentically, reflecting sincerity.

Accepting Responsibility

Admission of being wrong is difficult for many of us, as it makes us doubt ourselves and feel like failures.  Yet accepting responsibility can be sufficient for those we have hurt.  Saying "I am wrong" tells others we are able to overcome our larger "self" and admit our fault.  Owning your mistakes, showing your vulnerability and setting aside your ego displays sincerity in our apology.

Make Restitution

Some feel that for sincere apologies, actions should be justified.  Demonstrating the apology such as flowers, a card, a grand expression of regret can help.  Strong efforts to make amends are required for those that believe in this type of language.  Assurance of love, respect and desire to right your wrong are welcomed.

Genuinely Repent

This language displays not only a sincere apology but the desire to modify behaviour to avoid the situation in the future.  This stems from the heart in order to truly change.  A glimpse of true self, showing vulnerability, the desire to change and a plan to make it happen is assurance to those that accept this language of apology.

Request Forgiveness

For some, a verbal request for forgiveness is wanted.  Assurance that forgiveness is recognized and they are still loved.  Requesting forgiveness is also requesting the relationship to be fully restored, because you are proving that you truly sorry for what has occurred.  Also, you are wiling to put the future of the relationship in the hands of the other person, leaving the final decision to them - forgive or not to forgive.  Not an easy situation because you are opening yourself to rejection, or alternatively an opportunity to grow and heal from the situation regardless of the outcome.

It is important to understand that forgiveness should not be treated lightly.  

It is precious and needs to be cherished and appreciated.  

The act of forgiveness is hard on both sides 

~ for the person who is asking and for the person who is accepting.  

Try remembering that and practicing empathy when you next opportunity for forgiveness arises.