" Inside The Cynic ... "

“I hear my poisons in the multitude

Why was I damned a human deemed too rude

Somewhere between the madness and my mind

I live with legions called the human kind

I wander aimlessly amongst the herd

Infesting shadows, I am undeterred

I give opinion cuz you give no peace

They say we manifest the new dis-ease

See the lies you've given me

This is not what I should be

You say your truth isn't mine

Everything, everything, everything you says's a lie”

~ Stone Sour ~ Inside The Cynic ~

***

Cynic’s are often portrayed as pessimistic, but a healthy dose of skepticism does help, a dose of caution.  And the original definition of cynicism was’t about seeing the world in a pessimistic way as much as advocating a simpler lifestyle in the pursuit of virtue.  Today, cynic’s are thought of those who always believe the worst in humanity.

Do you believe with cynicism has it’s place or do you believe it is just a disgruntle view on a popular trend or maybe just a grumpy disposition?  Human conditioning almost always leads us to a negative outlook before a positive one.  

So where did all this cynicism come from?

Lack of trust ... spend an evening with a few cynical people and you will realize that they are a special breed of person.  You may even know the type if you are not one yourself.  Because a true cynic ... distrusts EVERYTHING new they see or hear ... they are intolerant of new ideas ... and they are pessimistic about EVERYTHING.  And all this usually occurs when we are emotionally vulnerable.  It is a coping mechanism, a way to protect themselves.  And sadly, the more negativity they see in the world, the more likely they are to share that disposition with others.

Reflecting on a previous post on being selective ... you will usually become like the 5 people you hang out with.  So choose wisely.  Cynical people tend to surround themselves with other cynical people.  It’s worth considering what impact these social relationships have on you.  

From personal experience, I have had many cynical friends over the years.  Those friends were funny in my younger years, but as life continued, that cynicism and negativity wore on the friendship.  It was hard to kick the habit, but I am SO grateful they are no longer in my life.

You may be thinking that this is not you, and not your social circle.  If so, bravo! ... just honestly ask yourself ... do you spend the bulk of your time complaining about things, do you whine about trivial mishaps from the day, or do you resent anything new.  Because cynicism is the easiest of all reactions, but also the most self-defeating one.

www.walkstrong.ca

" Feed ... "

I erased you
From my every waking memory
I replaced you
With a vision that you - won't see

Pity is a four letter word
And so is quit
(and so is left but I'm)

Right where you wanted me
Feed from the inside
Out of bitter sympathy ...

~ Sevendust ~ Feed ~

***

I use to believe that people that support you, love you and respect you will not only acknowledge your emotions but affirm them.  Shoot, I got it half right?! It IS about awareness of what you are IN ... but it is not about affirmation.  Personally, it has taken me to a place, where I ask, “ what am I nurturing in myself?”

You see, in the midst of any crisis, love, kindness, empathy, compassion, humility, peace and honesty are required.  Not only from within but from your primary relationships.  But it doesn’t always work that way.  You don’t need someone to dwell on everything that went wrong, complain about it to anyone who will listen, focus on what is lacking and feed your days through negativity.  

Basically, victim hood does not require a cheering squad!?!

Le sigh ... I know makes no sense right ... I mean if they care about you, why?

Well, my guess is that they are frustrated, angry and feel helpless.  Perhaps they cannot do the one thing you need, rather they jump on your bandwagon and help you down the vortex you are so quickly falling into.  And basically, they are projecting their fear onto you.  Yes, FEAR.  And they genuinely have no idea of what is happening because they. just. love. you.

Yet what you need is a helping hand.  An honest voice.  Someone to tell you that it is time to take responsibility for your actions.  Someone to tell you can’t blame practitioners, authorities, family, friends or employers.  Because at some point in your life, YOU made a decision.  And now this is the consequence.  Acceptance to what is, in my humble opinion, this is where deep healing begins.

Yes, finding yourself surrounded by negativity can be scary.  You could have build your whole life around it.  But ask yourself ... are you better than you were yesterday ... healthier, happier, stronger and more at peace  

Because if you are obeying others, you are not listening to yourself.

Engaging in conversations that feel right, talking about things that excite me, focusing on what makes me feel fortunate is where I am.   I may never feel permanently peaceful, but I can choose to question discontent ... from there I can then develop a self-awareness and hope to give what I’ve gained.

www.walkstrong.ca

" This Routine … "

I've seen a thousand thoughtless faces today

A thousand i saw yesterday

It's our ignorance that keeps us up to pace

It's our tvs that keep us smiling

And all the world's money won't buy you freedom,

Diamond rings don't save lives

How can a man ever be free

Half the world is sleeping now in front of tvs

And the other half is crying to the night sky

Is this why we were born?

I say f*ck this routine

~ The Broadways ~ This Routine ~

***

Life is a routine and routine is resistance to wonder, according to Abraham Joshua Heschel, who was one of the leading American Rabbis, theologians, and social activists of the 20^th century. 

Do you feel your routine is an issue … 

Do you just get use to & learn to accept which limits in how you see things?  

Do you feel you’ve lost a sense of wonder in our world?

live the dream to become the dream

Whoa! heavy questions right off the bat ... but something to think about ... as this is something I am struggling with at the moment.  Not the sense of wonder, excitement and curiosity ... I continue to put in the WORK to be present in that space ... it is hearing from the others ... “it doesn’t matter, who cares, we’ve always done it this way, i won’t work anyhow ...”

And no surprise right ... we’ve ALL been there ... discouraged, depressed and defeated.  But we are not trees.  We can move.  We can change.  We can create ... IF we choose to break out of what “isn’t working” we make that space.

Accepting who you are and believing nothing is changeable is lethal.  All to often we attempt to change our situation without looking at the root cause ... ourselves.  You can make a difference in your life if you change the way you interact with the world.

I hope that others begin with visualizing their hopes and dreams ~ this harnesses the power within and creates new pathways and routines.  I hope that they play out new scenarios in their minds and lives as they prepare for the moments when a new found confidence is crucial.  

Life really is about breaking out of your routine and comfort zone … 

allowing life to unfold … and remaining open to the possibilities.

www.walkstrong.ca

" Angry ... "

So scream you, out from behind the bitter ache

Heavy on the memory, you need most

Still want love, ugly, smooth and delicate

Not without affection, not alone

And instead of wishing that it would get better

Man you're seeing that you just get angrier

And it's good that I'm not angry

I just need to get over

I'm not angry, anymore

~ Matchbox 20 ~ Angry ~

***

Is it okay to feel angry?  Yes, because anger is a useful emotion.  It gives us feedback that something has happened ... our boundaries have been crossed or we have been violated in some way.  When we feel anger, we are more likely to do something about it .... the trick is to step back from the anger and make a rational decision about what you are going to do.  Yeah, easier said than done right?

You see, when we are in a state of emotional arousal, we don’t necessarily make the best decisions.  Our reasoning conscious mind can let our subconscious mind take control ... and our fight/flight response kicks in.  Why?  Because our brains treat any threats in the same manner ... we feel rage or fear, regardless of the situation.

Anger is a craving or grasping of beliefs around ourselves.  It is a normal emotion that all human beings feel, like sorrow and happiness.  Think about it ... from a young age, we feel anger ... like a newborn turning red and crying with a little twisted face or a two year old throws a temper tantrum.  It is obvious that they are experiencing intense anger and that they have not yet learned to manage their anger.  Sadly, many adults have never learned to manage their anger either.  They may not behave in quite the same manner as the two year old, but still harmful to self.

So is it better to express or suppress these emotions?  Studies have shown that people who are shy and non-assertive, have a greater prevalence of tumours than other personality types ... because shyness is associated with suppressing of emotions, particularly negative ones, like anger, resentment and bitterness.  Holding onto these emotions can literally eat away at you.  Now that doesn’t mean that every shy person will develop cancer, but it is definitely something to consider. 

My opinion?  Express yourself ... constructively.  Because life is energy in play and the more free flowing the energy is the more vibrant you feel.  Pockets of energy which are suppressed, or “held”, within you become sources of resistance to the free flow of your life expression.  They tend to lose their power over you and their ability to cause harm.

Realization: Forgiving is not about ‘giving’ something to the person who has wronged you.  It is about ‘giving’ yourself the permission to release the burden of carrying those emotions.

Learning to channel your feelings into words or actions that are not hurtful, positive and healthy will unburden you .... because managing anger destructively is actually allowing your anger to manage you. 

" Peace ... "

Just look at me

I am walking of incoming

Look at the frequencies of which I vibrate

I'm going to light up the world

Peace will come to me

Peace will come to me

Just look at me

I am a living act of holiness

Giving all the positive virtues that I possess

I'm going to light up the world

~ Depeche Mode ~ Peace ~

***

I know how exhausting it is to carry around useless, pointless and harmful thought forms.  All it does is occupy my mind and bring stress and grief along the way.  So I was quite thrilled to learn I am not alone, thanks some amazing friends, realizing we are all guilty, participating in this self-induced torture at some point in our lives.  

Looking back at your past, there may be guilt, shame or regret which feed these negative thought forms.  Feelings around things that you should have done but you didn’t do.  The people you should have valued more, the words you should have never said.  It is what it is ... so now “how do you start making peace with your past?”  

I am making a conscious effort to eliminate the thoughts of negativity that I harbour.  Yes, it is work in progress.  Fortunately, a great healing source asked me some profound questions:

• how can someone’s image of you affect you negatively without your permission?
• what is it that is causing your pain?
• what did you lose/gain?
• did you grieve/mourn when you needed to?
• are you ready to forgive?

I realize that facing my feelings head-on helps.  Flashback ... I remember exactly what I felt.  Vividly.  But what if I actively alter those feelings by changing the way I view the events in the past.  Remember not the actual events of the past but the way I view the event.  For example, instead of thinking about how much I hurt, I can think of how far I have come and what challenge I was  able to overcome all by myself.  I realize that my past shapes my future but it is up to me to choose the kind of shape I want to live with.  

I believe that making peace with your past is possible ... that we are not controlled by what happened ... that we are in charge of our present and future.  I understand the hurts in my past does not deter me from moving on, and really, life does go on ...

We can make an affirmative decision to go forward on a path of light, goodness and healing.  Detach our fears of past inadequacies and participate in the the closure phase of forgiveness.  Put down our battle swords and pick up beaming candles of light and healing.  Arm ourselves with a shield of light and love.  By committing to this spiritual practice, we embrace each connection as a divine assignment and will begin to heal ourselves and those around us.

Let go and Let the Uni-verse decide ... Leave room for miracles to happen ॐ