" Dear No One … "

I like being independent

Not so much of an investment

No one to tell me what to do

I like being by myself

Don’t gotta entertain anybody else

No one to answer to

But sometimes, I just want somebody to hold

Someone to give me their jacket when its cold

Got that young love even when we’re old

Yeah sometimes, I want someone to grab my hand

You’ll be here, but for now

Dear no one, this is your love song

~ Tori Kelly ~ Dear No One ~

***

February 4, 2014 ... World Cancer Day ... a day to raise awareness of cancer and to encourage its prevention, detection and treatment ... a day to “support” cancer patients worldwide.  In honour of this “day”, I decided to write an open letter for those who are newly diagnosed or living with this condition.  

Dear Friend,

Although we have never met, I wanted to share with you my thoughts in hopes to help you in your brave journey.  You may not be feeling to brave at the moment.  And that is okay.  You may have no clue what to do next.  And that is more than okay.  First, take this moment and just breathe because you are OKAY.

From my experience, 

... do your research.  Understand your condition and treatment options available.  And remember, just because they don’t have any other options, doesn’t mean sh*t.

... surround yourself with supportive, loving and compassionate practitioners whom respect your choice of treatment.

… unconditional love from my husband and family carries me through my journey.  I am grateful every day for them as I would not be here today.

... close friends may distance themselves and distant friends will become closer.  It’s all in how you handle it, let them help you when you need it.  Recognize your anger and resentment may be about your condition and not about about a person.

... people will say odd things to you because they don’t know how to deal with it.  Decide how important it is for you to discuss it with them or to just let it go.  

... others will just “check in” to see how you are and possibly if you still have a pulse.  Don’t take it personally, it is what it is.  Know who you can trust, know who you can share with, know who you can kindly decline.

... decide if your diagnosis is punishment or a blessing.  It took a lot of work, time, sweat and tears before I could see the gift.  Keep searching, however dire the situation, you will find it.

... change how you speak to yourself about your condition.  your body has cancer, not you, not your soul.  you created it, you can release it ... it is not a battle as it is a part of you which requires the same compassion and kindness as all of you.

... don’t believe the prognosis.  No one has a crystal ball, no one knows the future, no one knows for sure.  You have the power to within you to live or die, you.

… faith, spirituality and meditation have provided so much depth, perspective and clarity in my life.  Take this opportunity to nurture your soul and activate your inner healing.  

... there is more urgency in this moment so make a decision to live your life NOW.  Don’t wait.  Don’t procrastinate.  Ask yourself what are you waiting for? whats holding you back?

... now you have been put into a category, label or group.  there is a stigma and people now view you as a “cancer patient”, but you get to decide where you put your focus.  Focus on thriving, not just surviving. 

And, never let anyone tell you it is too late because I believe it is only too late when you decide to give up.  Now, ask yourself, do you believe this is your wake up call or your death sentence?

Sincerely,

your new friend