" Respect ... "

I ain't gonna do you wrong while you're gone

Ain't gonna do you wrong (oo) 'cause I don't wanna (oo)

All I'm askin' (oo)

Is for a little respect when you come home (just a little bit)

Baby (just a little bit) when you get home (just a little bit)

Yeah (just a little bit)

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

Find out what it means to me

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

Take care, TCB

~ Aretha Franklin ~ Respect ~

***

Lately the topic of respect seems to be surfacing in conversations around me ... mutual respect, lack of respect, and disrespect within relationships.  All types of relationships too.  And yes It is true that all relationships are different, yet despite their differences, one essential element makes all relationships work in a healthy way for both paties ... RESPECT.  Putting up with disrespectful behaviour for fear of losing someone as a partner or friend is destructive to self-worth, but people often let this happen.  Why?  well they don’t know how to identify signs of disrespect.  And without respect, no true friendship can take root.  

Here are some signs that will red flag if you are in the midst of an unhealthy situation:

• Trust - A perfectly normal emotion felt by people in relationships is jealousy, but the issue is how the person reacts or deals with these feelings.  When one person doesnt’ trust the other to enjoy other friendships, trust is lacking.  Healthy connections allow everyone to maintain their own identities and do things independently of the other person, free of suspicion.   

• Honesty - This is fundamental to respectful, trusting relationships.  Being honest and openly communicating thoughts and feelings make your relationship stronger.  Being nonjudgemental, accepting and valuing each other’s opinions, beliefs and feelings.  Signs that respect is lacking include lying and situations in which one party belittles or is intolerant of the other for feeling or thinking a certain way.

• Fairness and Equality - This involves balance, and requires give and take from both sides ... this can be lacking when one person consistently excludes the other from decision making.  Also when one person is forced to compromise to satisfy the other, respect is lacking.

• Mutual Support - Being present when times are good AND bad.  A respectful relationship is a partnership in which people work together to achieve common goals as well as support each other when things get tough.  If you can’t count on them during these challenging times, these are signs of respect deficienty in the relationship.

We all have experiences we can share with each other when it comes to relationships.  We live and learn.  Remember to choose your relationships wisely and be the kind of person you want in return.  Lead by example.  And as hard as it may be, confront those who show you disrespect.  If you have someone whose level of respect does not meet your expectations and they refuse to consider your feelings, you must be willing to distance yourself from them.  

Seek those whom are more likely to pull you up then push you down ...

" Solitude ... "

" How many times have you told me you love her
As many times as I've wanted to tell you the truth
How long have I stood here beside you
I live through you
You looked through me
Ooh, Solitude,
Still with me is only you
Ooh, Solitude,
I can't stay away from you "

~ Evanescence ~ Solitude ~

***

During the Gerson Therapy, each day is predictable.  13 juices, 80 + supplements, 3-5 coffee enemas and loads and loads of preparation time.  Each day is the same schedule, same programme.  Variations occur after frequent consults, depending on your test results.  And during all this, there is a lot of solitude.  You may be thinking that I was going to say loneliness.  Well, if I'm honest, there is some of that too.  You see, from the outside, solitude and loneliness look a lot alike.  Both are characterized by solitariness.  But there is a difference.

Loneliness comes from isolation and is a negative state.  We usually feel something is missing even when we are surrounded by people ... which is the most bitter form of loneliness.  Isolation from being a part of daily life activities such as absence from work, absence of friendships and not having the ability to attend or participate. 

Whereas, solitude comes from the state of being alone and not being lonely ... leading to self-awareness. It is a positive and constructive state with oneself.  It is a desirable state where you provide yourself the best company, YOU.  So where does the self-awareness part fit in?  Well, solitude allows for a time that can be used for reflection, inner searching or growth & enjoyment of some kind.  An activity such as deep reading requires solitude, or experiencing the beauty of nature.  And, usually forms of creativity such as composing, writing or blogging requires solitude.  

Stemming from a state of inner richness, solitude suggests peacefulness ... it is refreshing ... an opportunity to renew or replenish ourselves.  Stemming from a state of discontent, loneliness is harsh, punishment and deficient.  Marked by a sense of estrangement, loneliness is an awareness of excess aloneness.  Solitude is something you choose.  Loneliness is imposed on you by others.

So you see, periods of solitude are essential, allowing a time to explore and know ourselves, a chance to regain perspective.  Solitude renews us for the challenges of life ... allows us to drive our own lives rather than having them run by demands from others.  So welcome solitude into your life ... it will help restore your body and mind ... it is the nest of your thoughts.