thank-you for BEING ...

a time of endings ... and beginnings

Four years ago, I could see in her eyes as I spoke with fear.  She was reliving her experiences, yet still keeping it in check, she gave me sound advice.  M was able to provide support, love and compassion even though she had been dealing with the dreaded "C" herself. 

… when I called M and told her that I had just been diagnosed with breast cancer, she knew she had her hands full … not only was I a mess, she had brought arm loads of resources on therapies, supplements, articles and latest trials over.  M’s kick ass approach to life is what attracted me to our friendship.  Her honest, compassionate presence allowed space for me to just be accepted as I was, completely whole, regardless of the dis-ease that began and remained within us.  M and I had got each other because we both got cancer-ed.

We met thru mutual means earlier in life and our friendship deepened with the ongoing awareness that we were both dealing with a very similar, yet very different situation.  We may not have got each others symptoms, but we connected in a very authentic way until her final breathe.

M would be one of a few people that was a constant in my life.  I realize the sadness I feel is the loss of not only a beautiful friend but a kind soul whom I am blessed to have known.  

M, beautiful soul sister, thank-you for BEING ... infinite love ...

REST IN PEACE

" Solitude ... "

" How many times have you told me you love her
As many times as I've wanted to tell you the truth
How long have I stood here beside you
I live through you
You looked through me
Ooh, Solitude,
Still with me is only you
Ooh, Solitude,
I can't stay away from you "

~ Evanescence ~ Solitude ~

***

During the Gerson Therapy, each day is predictable.  13 juices, 80 + supplements, 3-5 coffee enemas and loads and loads of preparation time.  Each day is the same schedule, same programme.  Variations occur after frequent consults, depending on your test results.  And during all this, there is a lot of solitude.  You may be thinking that I was going to say loneliness.  Well, if I'm honest, there is some of that too.  You see, from the outside, solitude and loneliness look a lot alike.  Both are characterized by solitariness.  But there is a difference.

Loneliness comes from isolation and is a negative state.  We usually feel something is missing even when we are surrounded by people ... which is the most bitter form of loneliness.  Isolation from being a part of daily life activities such as absence from work, absence of friendships and not having the ability to attend or participate. 

Whereas, solitude comes from the state of being alone and not being lonely ... leading to self-awareness. It is a positive and constructive state with oneself.  It is a desirable state where you provide yourself the best company, YOU.  So where does the self-awareness part fit in?  Well, solitude allows for a time that can be used for reflection, inner searching or growth & enjoyment of some kind.  An activity such as deep reading requires solitude, or experiencing the beauty of nature.  And, usually forms of creativity such as composing, writing or blogging requires solitude.  

Stemming from a state of inner richness, solitude suggests peacefulness ... it is refreshing ... an opportunity to renew or replenish ourselves.  Stemming from a state of discontent, loneliness is harsh, punishment and deficient.  Marked by a sense of estrangement, loneliness is an awareness of excess aloneness.  Solitude is something you choose.  Loneliness is imposed on you by others.

So you see, periods of solitude are essential, allowing a time to explore and know ourselves, a chance to regain perspective.  Solitude renews us for the challenges of life ... allows us to drive our own lives rather than having them run by demands from others.  So welcome solitude into your life ... it will help restore your body and mind ... it is the nest of your thoughts.