" The Hurry and The Harm ... "

“ But why are we so worried more about the hurry 

and less about the harm?

Always trying to conquer that which does not offer 

anything more than a broken heart.

Oh what a cost for love ...

Only want oh simple things, 

mourning the loss and what could have been.

When did I let go to all that I use to know 

this grave mistake has left an absence of hope.

I'm going back to the start “

~ City And Colour ~ The Hurry And The Harm ~

***

We all have it in us to behave in the ways we judge others.  That is why we judge, because we are judging a part of us.  A dark part of us that we keep hidden.  That no one sees.  But it is still there.  Lurking.  Waiting.  Wondering what will be the trigger. 

Recently, we watched a great movie, The Dhamma Brothers, in our weekly meditation crew.  Highly recommended, we had an opportunity to see transformations occur within people who had been written off by society.  Truly a powerful movie.

And it made me think ... is someone bad or did they behave badly?  Do we shame people in our lives, for what they did, by labelling them rather than the act?  There are always consequences to our actions as the actions themselves carry power.  What we do and say has this power, meaning and purpose.  

And sometimes ... we just make 

really. poor. choices.

But as it is being explained to me ... to harm another individual, you have to experience harm personally.  That is how you know the difference.  A terrorist has been terrorized.  A rapist has been violated.  It is learned, taught, shown, explained ... it is EXPERIENCED first ... that is if you believe this way.  Some don’t so whatever floats your boat.

Yet, we are judged very quickly on what we do wrong, rather than all the things we do right.  And many don’t want to believe or accept that someone can change.  I have heard many times ... “A leopard doesn’t change it’s spots” ... but isn't that because he was born with them on his skin?  Rather, we can change our behaviour ... how we respond, act and do.

We learn that nothing out “there” will make us happy ... chasing after something that doesn't last.  All is temporary.  All is impermanent.  And this can provide a sense of chaos or relief in your life ... depending on where you are in your journey.  

The bad news is, all things are temporary

The good news is, all things are temporary

Perspective is what will give you a chance to consider another possibility.  Another way because maybe your road can be less bumpy.  And really that is where I am at.  When cancer lives with you, there is a shit of stuff that comes to the surface.  And you have sift through, process and let it go.  In the beginning, you are venturing into unknown territory.  But when the fear of the unknown turns into curiosity for what is, the dark parts don’t seem as ... dark.  When the time is as it should be, a crack appears, which allows the light to shine out.  The light that was and always is within all of us.

If you took a selfie of your soul, 

you’d see how beautiful you really are ...

We forget to practice the most important practice ... loving kindness towards ourselves.  It is time to believe in yourself.  It is time to listen within.  

BE in stillness ... the answers are all there.

www.walkstrong.ca

" Blessed … "

At the first sight of rays of light I hear the birds sing

It's a sign he's given me every thing will be OK

Sometimes when I wake up 

And I'm wondering how my life would have been if I didn't sing

I get a little stressed out every now and then

But problems come and problems go when I'm around him

Blessed in the morning

Blessed in the evening

And again I realize the reason why I sing

Every time, Always

I'm blessed, So blessed

~ Avicii ~ Blessed ~

***

Almost three years ago to the day, we met some very interesting people.  Under the circumstances, grasping for hope, these same people became our life long friends.  One of those friends was Charlie Hardin.

I always appreciated how openly Charlie expressed himself.  From our time in Tijuana till our last conversation, we would share, console, encourage and motivate.  Recently, Charlie had told me how he was getting back into daily activities and continuing to live his life in the present moment.  Charlie said that he felt an inner calmness and quiet peace.  He said “it’s not a state of euphoria, it’s an absence of the self induced inner torment I used to live with daily”.  Charlie's attitude was inspiring …

Charlie often spoke to me about gratitude and how grateful he was for his wife … as in his words “ my gratitude for her is off the charts and in a class all on its own”.  And also expressed his appreciation for earthly angels, friends and family, who were supportive of his choices.  

Charlie told me about his gratitude for understanding the principles of natural healing and how it helped him take control.  He mostly appreciated the peaceful life they had grown to love enjoying nature and outdoor activities in the rich natural environment of their region.  

And I always enjoyed our lengthy discussions, especially on the book “The Tibetan Book Of Living And Dying”, as it brought us both a sense of understanding as to who we really are and why we are really here.  We often talked about how we were tired of tests, doctors and thinking about “that stuff”.  Rather than revolving our lives around cancer, new therapies and new trials, we would rather just enjoy life instead.  Again, Charlie's attitude was inspiring ...

My life is so much more richer having known Charlie Hardin.  His wisdom, kindness, love and sincerity will stay with me till my journey ends.  Thank-you for blessing our lives Charlie, rest in peace friend … 

"On this life journey that I have chosen, I learned a lot, loved a lot and laughed a lot. I have been blessed beyond my wildest dreams with a wonderful wife and children and family and friends. The more years I lived, the more tangible God's presence in my life became. That presence has enabled me to have a peaceful mind in this life and it enables me to embrace my transition into the next life without fear." 

 Charlie Hardin

In Loving Memory of Manuel Razo ...

They say it's your birthday

It's my birthday too, yeah

They say it's your birthday

We're gonna have a good time

I'm glad it's your birthday

Happy birthday to you ...

Ah

Come on

Yes we're going to a party party ...

I would like you to dance (Birthday)

Take a cha-cha-cha-chance (Birthday)

I would like you to dance (Birthday)

Dance yeah

Oh

Come on ...

~ The Beatles ~ Birthday ~

***

These lyrics may seem odd when writing about the passing away of our dear friend Manuel.  But this is the song he sang often at the Clinica Nutricion in Tijuana, Mexico .. forever in my mind and heart.

I remember coming down the stairs from our room to find Russell chatting with Manuel and his partner of 42 years.  Instantly, Manuel introduced himself and shared his story.  We had only been there a few days and it was so comforting to find another person, dealing with cancer, freely willing to connect.  

Manuel had a jolly attitude, almost child like in nature.  And he made sure to get to know everyone at the clinic ... fellow patients, caregivers, doctors, nurses and even the kitchen and cleaning staff.  We use to laugh about his potty mouth, no not like a trucker but more about his experience with the enemas in detail!  For Manuel, it didn’t matter if we were having a meal, we heard all about how difficult the experience was and also what resulted in the toilet afterwards.  Although there were a couple that were “bothered” by his candidness, the rest of us embraced his innocent spirit and kind nature.

For three weeks, a group of us ventured out to the ocean, usually on a daily basis.  We would go to the local coffee shoppes and of course found our way to the open mic pub that had instruments just awaiting us.  Russell and I would strike up an “acoustic” version of our cover band tunes with everyone joining in on singing, dancing, moving and shaking.  And you guessed it ... Manuel would sneak in The Beatles song “Birthday”!  He had a great voice to support his great passion of music.

When the time came to leave the clinic, many of us didn’t know if we would see each other again.  I remember when Manuel hugged me, whispering into my ear that he cared for everyone there, but I was his favorite.  Manuel told me he loved me and that I was part of his family.  And at that moment, I didn’t want to let go.  

A memory I will cherish for the rest of my life ...

Over the past two years plus, Manuel and I kept in touch.  Speaking often, sharing our ups and downs with this thing called cancer.  Manuel beat the odds for so long, because regardless of his prognosis, he had an upbeat attitude.  He told me that he wasn’t going to give up yet he also accepted that there was a bigger plan ... and to let go and let God.  

I know Manuel is somewhere singing a tune, smiling, dancing and laughing ... somewhere at peace where his mind can have the dream he desires ... somewhere where his body can have the peace he deserves.  

♥ Rest in Peace our beautiful friend ... 

we will always love you and never forget you ♥