" Dear God ... "

“ … Dear God the only thing I ask of you
When I'm much too far away
We all need that person who can be true to you 

And now I wish I'd stayed

'Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired

I'm missing you again oh no

Once again

Some search, never finding a way
Before long, they waste away

I found you, something told me to stay
I gave in, to selfish ways

Once again… “

~ Avenged Sevenfold ~ Dear God ~

***

“ I guess you’ve found God now “ was recently said.

Initially perplexed, I answered … “ I am learning to let go of fear with the intention to live the rest of this life with purpose and clarity “

You should have seen the expression on their face. ... 

Naturally during times of illness, great pain and suffering, we may gravitate toward a spiritual practice, as it provides a way sometimes to heal the grief, sadness and bitterness all held up in our hearts.  Spirituality can be a means to cope.

Yet personally speaking, it isn’t about have a better connection with God. It is about having a better connection with Life.  Not believing that a Divine being out in the Universe will grant me immortality, rather I’ve been exploring the dysfunctional relationship I have had with life  …   

Each moment, each day, dealing with what comes up … and realizing that when I face a type of suffering, my faith is tested.  True faith begins with detachment becoming open to whatever arises, the unknown.  An opportunity in the face of this unknown to experience a special kind of peace, that there are infinite possibilities.  Faith is about letting go of certain outcome, a certain solution. Faith is about trusting the process.  Faith is believing All Is Well, regardless of what is.

This comes at a time when acceptance is necessary.  That a certain solution may not exist.  That you don’t have to figure it all out in this moment.  And that maybe there really is nothing TO figure out.  Shifting to a place of being, and tired of doing.  I often think of cancer or any severe illness as a type of dance.  Hoping to take the lead and be in control but not knowing it could switch in a moment.

And so spirituality allows me to shift to a place of acceptance … to manage, cope, deal and thrive, despite of this challenge.  Great words to live by and a guiding mantra recited within every day.  As I said recently to family, no one said this was going to be easy.  Yet having the ability to let go during times of darkness is where my faith truly prevails.  

“ … rather than being better. today. be there for yourself. when you wander or feel stagnant. know your path and you are one. and just like your breath. up and down. your path is about learning. to love. you. unconditionally. so today sweet soul. trust what is within you. enjoy who you are. more than enough … “

www.walkstrong.ca

" Gifting ... "

" ... It's funny how it starts, just how it all begins
You get your sights on dreams, and man a thousand different things
You are on for yourself, you're chasing cool desire
You get addicted fast, but man you're playin' with fire

Then there's a day that comes to you
When you get all you want, but there's a space inside that's still as empty as it was
'Till an angel comes your way and man she's fallin fast
You know she's so in need but she is to afraid to ask

So you hold on out your hands and catch her best you can
And in givin' love you feel a better man

And the gift is what you get by givin' more than you receive
And you're learnin' fast that maybe this is how you'll be happy
'Cause in takin' everything you lost, the air you need to breath
But in givin' it away, you found the precious thing you see ... "

 

~ Blue ~ The Gift ~

***

Purchasing the perfect gift, tis the season … the practice of giving extends to all forms of giving.  Yet I believe there is no separation from givers, receivers or gifts.  I believe all of life is always giving and receiving at the same time. 

Yet, if a gift is not in material form, is it still a gift?  Can the gift of listening, the gift of love, the gift of creation, the gift of attention and the gift of effort satisfy?  Is that too easy, too simple, too trivial to be considered a gift …

There can be a few ways to practice unconditional giving … giving the gift of kindness, compassion and generosity … giving fully and without reservation the gift of your presence and respect.

My spiritual teacher told us recently that if you needed something you would have it … therefore if you don’t have it, you don’t need it … simple to consider but not so simple to practice.  Because we are told how, why, when and where to buy that special gift for that special someone … can your presence then simply be enough …. Yes!

Gifting those that have - have everything.  Have everything … everything they have.  Something to consider when fighting the crowds for a parking spot, or a sale item, or the latest gadget, or the newest trend.  Because you are enough and you always have been.  Realizations set in that you cannot buy love and friends.  You just need to be … be real and be present.  Gifting is a beautiful gesture if there are no strings attached … unconditional gifting.

And there it is … the gift is within YOU!

Do we give from the heart or give to get the best reaction … do we give because we love or give to win them over … questions best to be considered in stillness, where the answers are always available.  Regardless of your gifting choices, most of us know the more you give the more you receive as the opportunity is the gifting itself.

" Awaken ... "

“ start of lyrics Stripped of life, alone

In the midst of something that I ...

wanting, letting go, of what never could be again

Lost and alone

Imprisoned now inside your mind

With the way you tried ...

You were waiting and living for no one

With the way you tried

To completely refuse all your life

Feed on your nothing

You'll never live up to me

Awaken you “

~ Disturbed ~ Awaken ~

***

What happens when a fully aware person is in a room full of asleep people? ... Awesome stories!! ... and honestly, an opportunity to practice what you’ve learned thus far.  And thankfully, the Universe has a Divine ability to present just that.  

Picture a room full of the following behaviours ... obnoxious, rude, arrogant, egotistical, drunk, righteous.  So it is s simply easier to be frustrated, angry, pissed off, livid, aggressive ... and join the movement!!  And yeah, some of those feelings do arise, yet honestly speaking, but rather than acting out on it, I just sat with it ... yeah, I sat with it.  

Drunk desperate people, triggering every last ounce of patience you may have.  Acting cool, but not being cool.  Acting righteous but oh so off the mark, it’s comical.  

Serenity now, serenity now ...

And that is exactly what it is.  An opportunity to either be an asshole or be a kind.  Most pick the asshole, not even knowing it, subconsciously, their conditioning kicks in.  And really it is easier.  It is easier to be a jerk than to put in the EFFORT to be kind, for some.  Why, because they don’t hear what they want, they don’t get what they want, they don’t get it fast enough ... so yeah, it pretty much ALL sucks.  Add to this a healthy dose of insecurity, we react.  We WANT to tell them that they cannot treat us like that.  We give our EGO a voice.  Period. 

I sat with IT and I had so many realizations.  And then it happened.  The vulnerability present in the situation was so apparent.  I could feel it, it was thick in the room, hanging in the air like the smoke in the non-smoking establishment.  Humans looking to prove something, looking for affirmation, looking for respect, looking for SOMETHING ... and there it was.  The frustration, anger, pissed off, livid and aggressive nature showed its colors.  Will they satisfy their cravings, their hunger?  Yes, but it will be short lived, looking for the next quick fix ... sex, alcohol, drugs.

I write about how the masks fall off when people truly reveal who they are, not their reputation, not what they can do, not what they have.  You see, when you get an opportunity to observe rather than participate ... grab it because the learning curve is infinite.  Begin by making sure you caution yourself from being righteous, looking for something wrong, all smugged up.  It’s not about judging others ... it is about understanding and praying for others.  Yup, praying.

Praying because they can end their suffering simply by looking for affirmation, respect, love ... that SOMETHING ... WITHIN.  Even the crusty ones that seem to have “endure” life.  You know the one, in the dark corner of the seedy pub, been there-done that.  Because an open mind starts with an open heart.  Digging deep to find grace, compassion, kindness and empathy for them.  They are a prisoner to they own emotions, imagine what hell they must go through daily in their own minds.  And maybe praying is a lit-tle TOO religious for some ... possibly send them well wishes and blessings to end their suffering.  Because IT is not about you.

Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart.  

Who looks outside, dreams.  Who looks inside, awakens.

Carl Gustav Jung