" Dealing ... "

“ ... Where do we go from here

What do i do with these feelings

longing to have you near

knowing we shouldn't be dealing ... 

Why must the bad things always feel so good

Why can't i just stay away

Thought our situation was understood, 

still does not mean its okay

Knowing we shouldn't be dealing ... 

I'll wake up in the morning and it will not be the same

Everything's is different we just play this simple game ... “

~ Eric Roberson ~ Dealing ~

***

Dealing with cancer is like pandora’s box.  Full of surprises.  I use to believe that my body betrayed me and just gave up.  

I bought into the idea that I would grow up, get an education, get a good job, get married, have kids and all would be well ... exactly as planned.  But when the bubble burst, all that was left was guilt ... that if I had just been a better daughter, sister, wife, friend, employee ... that I would not have got cancer-ed.  I didn’t understand why others habitual behaviours didn’t lead to an illness.  I had enormous guilt within me and societal influences supported my delusional mind. 

The truth is that within, I had no idea what cancer was and how I could get it.  I was in complete denial of what life was presenting.  I refused to accept the gravity of the situation and I didn’t know how to cope.  

Fast forward to those moments of anxiety, panic and stress when your body cannot do the things it use to prior to diagnosis ... acceptance.  The lesson I keep learning is it is not about how it should be, it is about how it feels ... gut feels.  And applying that in all aspects of this health crisis.  

So I am learning to gift myself the ability to rest my mind, when I choose, to observe my thoughts without judgement by focusing on one conscious breathe ... meditation.  I am learning to take my power back, learning to find joy in this journey and to shine this light within until my last conscious breathe.

And for the days that it seems so very hard to deal ... those days I tell myself ... it’s okay, you’ve done what you could, ease up and meet yourself at a softer place, let yourself rest, taking what you need, releasing what you don’t, you are safe, you are loved, you are protected ... while taking that one conscious breathe.

www.walkstrong.ca

" Cry ... "

" Somebody shakes when the wind blows

Somebody's missing a friend, hold on

Somebody's lacking a hero

And they have not a clue

When it's all gonna end

You can change the world (I can't do it by myself)

You can touch the sky (Gonna take somebody's help)

You're the chosen one (I'm gonna need some kind of sign)

If we all cry at the same time tonight "

~ Michael Jackson ~ Cry ~

***

Somedays is it hard to stay positive, focused.  Somedays is it hard to stay strong, have faith and know your truth.  Somedays you just feel awful, question your path and just want to cry.  Yes, I have had those days ... and where do they come from, what were my triggers .... well, I have had someone tell me that my spirits are not as high as they use to be.  I have had someone tell me that I put on weight.  I have had someone tell me that I hope I finally decide to do the right thing.  I have had the realization that a close friendship of mine as changed.  Yes I have had a few of those days.  On the flip side, I have also had people tell me ... don’t be negative.  But sometimes it is just difficult.  And most of my blogs are about attitude, strength and courage.  Yet I have to realize that I am human, normal and I have the same fears and doubts that everyone else does.  And that is okay ... it is also okay to cry, and cry is exactly what I did ... 

The bright side is that there are a great deal of healing benefits of crying.  When we cry, we release negative emotions in a natural way for our bodies to cope with unwanted feelings of distress or fear.  Yet there are several other benefits to our mental and physical health.  

Crying can lower our stress levels by removing some chemicals and hormones that are built up, similar to sweating when exercising.  And the opposite can happen if we hold back tears ... we can increase our stress levels which as we know can lead to numerous other health issues.

Crying is an emotional response so when we shed tears, our endocrine system releases endorphins, or feel-good hormones, that stabilize the mood ... some may identify with “I just needed a good cry”.  When we cry, we give our bodies the ability to stabilize and become balanced again.  

“Tears are natural antibacterial and antiviral solutions that fight germs we get in our eyes.  The fluid lysozyme in tears is capable of killing up to 95% of all bacteria in a matter of minutes”.  So crying can help prevent you from getting sick.

Not all tears are the same.  Tears that are formed out of emotional distress or grief have more toxic byproducts in them than tears of irritation.  So emotional tears, made from stress, are capable of washing away wastes and toxins, therefore detoxifying our bodies.

Crying moisten our eyes and prevent dehydration of membranes surrounding our eyeballs.  We need tears as they enable us to see, they provide the lubrication we need for healthy eyesight.

Crying has calming effects such as slowing of breath.  During the cry, you may have increased heart rate and sweating, however the calming effects usually last longer afterwards ... therefore remembering the pleasant side of a “good cry”.  

So remember, it’s your party and you can cry if you want to .... as crying does open up our hearts ... providing a safe space for clarity and clearing ... giving allowance to practice forgiveness and self-forgiveness.  And an opportunity to bring our mind, body and soul back in balance.

“Don’t cry because it is over, smile because it happened “ Dr. Seuss

"Tea In The Sahara ..."

"My sisters and I
Have this wish before we die
And it may sound strange
As if our minds are deranged
Please don't ask us why
Beneath the sheltering sky
We have this strange obsession
You have the means in your possession

We want our tea in the Sahara with you
We want our tea in the Sahara with you"

~ Sting ~ Tea In The Sahara ~

***

Today I had the pleasure of sharing a cup of tea with a loving friend.  I love visits, they sure do make my day.  And it was not just an ordinary tea we shared, it was Tulsi tea.  I was fortunate to have my Mom give Russell and I this plant which we have growing in a pot near our kitchen window.  Growing up, I knew about the Tulsi plant, mainly because of references made in bollywood movies nicely wrapped with some religious connection.  And I would admire it from afar every time we visited my parent's home.  My Mom is very proud of her Tulsi plant and then one lucky day, she gave me one to grow and nuture.  Yaay me!

So what is Tulsi you may be wondering?  Well, Tulsi (Hindi: तुलसी ) is also known as the "Holy Basil".  It is an aromatic plant ... considered widespread as a cultivated plant and an escaped weed.  It grows tall with hairy stems and simple opposite green leaves that are strongly scented.  Tulsi is cultivated for religious and medicinal purposes, and for its essential oil.  It is widely used across South Asia as a medicinal plant and an herbal tea.  Commonly used in Ayurveda, it has an important role within the tradition of Hinduism, in which devotees perform worship involving Tulsi plants or leaves.  India recognizes this sacred herb because of its health benefits and healing properties.

So what's all the healing hubbub about?  ...  Well, Tulsi is known for its rich antioxidant properties that are known to promote wellness by building the body's immune system, reducing stress and promoting mental clarity.  By protecting cells from the damage caused by free radicals, Tulsi facilitates the cause and progression of various types of dis-eases; basically inhibiting the growth of cancer cells.  And on a daily basis, Tulsi can help with infections from viruses, bacteria and fungi.  Sounds pretty cool eh?

So why not give it a go?  Perhaps skip that coffee and try out some Tulsi tea.  Pop down to your local organic food store and explore the tea section.  There a loads of brands to choose from.  And remember, above all else, it tastes so SO good, especially on a gorgeous fall day with a loving friend ... ahh BLISS!