" Embrace The End ... "

" The ending

That peace could grow inside of you

Inspite of me ... Humanity

I hope you’re out there somewhere ... 

Does anyone care

To disagree with me

Admit defeat we bleed

In disbelief

I hear the whole world

Welcome the way that we

Embrace the ending ...

Humanity 

I hope your out there somewhere "

~ Mushroomhead ~ Embrace The End ~

***

Endings are not always easy, even when you see them coming.  Loss is traumatic, even when you prepare yourself for the experience.  Yet with endings comes new beginnings, an opportunity for transformation.

Beginnings start to shape into something joyful yet painful ... exciting yet uncertain ... all at once.  You could stay focused on all of the newness to avoid the farewells, but then you miss honoring the very best parts of what came before. By acknowledging the joy and the sorrow, you can bring your loves and lessons into your new beginning.

We may initiate some of the beginnings and endings, but ready or not, many happen on their own schedule.  I have found that it is more productive to drop the judgement and begin by embracing the end ... 

I am open.  

I let go of my need to hold on to the past or attempts to control the future.  

I allow things to unfold.  

I notice the small shifts as change can occur at snail or warp speed, regardless of my preference.  

I ask for help.  I admit that I don’t know what I am doing.  

I am grateful for the support which helps me find laughter and joy in the process.

I don’t filter my feelings.  I own them 

... I tell a friend, I write, I release them in a un-harmful way.  

I find stillness.  I can’t stop time but I can make room to pause and access before moving forward.  

By becoming aware that change in upon us, we can embrace endings with calmness and truly trust the process of life.

www.walkstrong.ca

" A Matter Of Trust … "

Some love is just a lie of the heart
The cold remains of what began with a passionate start
And they may not want it to end
But it will, it's just a question of when
I've lived long enough to have learned
The closer you get to the fire the more you get burned
But that won't happen to us
Because it's always been a matter of trust ...

Some love is just a lie of the soul
A constant battle for the ultimate state of control
After you've heard lie upon lie
There can hardly be a question of why
Some love is just a lie of the heart
The cold remains of what began with a passionate start
But that can't happen to us
Because it's always been a matter of trust

~ Billy Joel ~ A Matter Of Trust ~ 

***

Suffering a betrayal of trust can be one of the most difficult times in your life ... and depending on the severity, some never recover.  Yet as we know ... life goes on, with or with out your participation.  And most of us recover ... sadly a bit more wounded, thankfully a bit more wiser.

As we move forward we decide if we are willing to give those that violate our trust another chance.  And regardless if they remain in our lives, it starts with forgiveness, because this is what leads to healing and restoration.

I remind myself that when I choose to rebuild a relationship, I choose to forgive what was and therefore make room for new memories ...

Trust is such a challenging thing to gain and once you lost it, some say it is impossible to regain.  Probably because wounds we gain from being hurt by those we love and admire run deep ... and not easy to get over ... but nothing is “impossible”.

So how do you rebuild trust?  You accept that you cannot change or fix the other person.  You take responsibility and apologize for your role in the situation.  You make an effort to not break future promises.  You become an active listener.  You put yourself in their shoes, empathize.

And when you have made a commitment to work on a fragile relationship the worst thing you can do is bring up past events.  If you say you have forgiven, it is unfair to bring up past mistakes.  Leave the past where it is, the past.

And be patient.  Allow the other person time ... time to understand, time to choose, time to reconcile, because regaining trust is a healing process and if the relationship is worth it, this too shall come.