" Surrender ... "

“ ... Surrender every word, every thought every sound.

Surrender every touch, every smile, every frown.

Surrender all the pain we've endured until now.

Surrender all the hope that I lost you have found.

Surrender yourself to me

I think I found a flower in a field of weeds,

I think I found a flower in a field of weeds.

Searching until my hands bleed,

This flower don't belong to me ...

(Surrender) I never had the nerve to ask ... “

~ Billy Talent ~ Surrender ~

***

It takes a quiet knowing within to understand you were born for something unique, something more.  And answering our personal calling is a walk of raw courage.

I have come to understand that surrendering is allowing and surrendering is receiving.  Because when it comes to accessing the courage to step into this life and who we really are, self-doubt rears its ugly head.  Inner criticism, groundless-ness, confusion ... all part of the journey.  So surrendering is a yielding to the calling within.  Avoidance of it, halts our spiritual growth.

When we surrender to our calling or our path, we feel uncomfortable, hidden and misunderstood; yet, the deepest healing, growth and inner transformation takes place.  Because it is in surrendering to the process of the call that we find our whole.  We are brought back to truth.  

Each one of us has a unique gift to share, some just haven’t taken the time to unravel it yet.  Surrendering is part of the unravelling and easily misunderstood as passivity.  Yet it is change in stance, state of being.  It is a softening, a coming home to.  it is what we receive when we’ve made peace with life.  We feel a softness, not striving in our lives.

Take meaningful action and find your true self.  Wake up to what it’s all about and what all the circumstances are for, LOVE.  Begin to see how life is releasing exquisite gems to you in every moment, like water dripping from the tap.  And realize that connection and tenderness are available for the faces that grace your life.

www.walkstrong.ca

" Failure ... "

“ ... Life will come our way, it has only just begun

The world will die alone, the frail will fall below

Time will take our place, we return it back to one

The calm before the cold, the long and lonely road

Look for the light that leads me home

Tired of feeling lost, tired of letting go

Tear the whole world down, tear the whole world down

Failure

We bury the sunlight, we bury the sunlight

Failure, failure ... “

~ Breaking Benjamin ~ Failure ~

***

It is still hard to say the F word out loud.  Most of us feel awkward, vulnerable, uncomfortable with the idea.    We are afraid of it and don’t want to even mention it in case we jinx our situation ... and by the way, the F word I am referring to is ... failure.  

For most of my life, I allowed failure to define me.  I let failure decide if I was going to achieve what I set out.  I let failure guide my outcome.  Regardless of new work, new ventures or new goals, failure always crept into my mind.  

Yet I have had to learn that over time, learning to love failure and embrace it in ways, give me power.  Failure does not require me to give up, it requires me to learn ... more.  I have had to learn that failure can be a momentary defeat, something that is a small obstacle, to again, learn and move through.  

Failure is only real once you accept it as real

you only fail at something once you give up on it ... 

Failure gives us a to re-evaluate and find the gift within what has occurred, teaching something valuable.  Failure will never seem permanent, nor will it shatter your confidence and belief in yourself.  

Failure may paralyze you,  

but it doesn’t define you ...

If we simply view failure as progress, we realize we are moving forward.  The only way to never achieve anything in life is to never try to do anything.  When we experience failure, we are in the process of learning, growing and achieving our goals. 

Regardless of your level of risk taking, your level of success will be equivalent to the level of the failure that came before it ... failure is not as important as the courage it takes to try ... keep going, you are enough xx

www.walkstrong.ca

" Moment of Surrender ... "

At the moment of surrender

I folded to my knees

I did not notice the passers by 

And they did not notice me

I’ve been in every black hole

At the alter of the Dark star

My body's now a begging bowl

That's begging to get back

Begging to get back 

To my heart

To the rhythm of my soul

To the rhythm of my consciousness

To the rhythm that yearns

To be released from control

At the moment of surrender

Of vision over visibility 

I did not notice the passers by

And they did not notice me

~ U2 ~ Moment of Surrender ~

***

Surrender ... one of the most important aspects of spirituality.  Used synonymously with letting go, allowing or movement of energy.  With a nemesis named resistance.

So what is it to surrender, why is it so hard to practice?

Well in it’s traditional sense, surrender is to “include a sense of loss and defeat, a place of weakness and inability, a choice to end the experience and exit the journey ... to yield something to the possession or power of another; deliver up possession of on demand or under duress.”

Yet in a spiritual context, surrender means something very different.   It is the wholehearted cooperation with the inevitable.  As Eckhart Tolle says “ ... say YES to life and see how life suddenly starts working for you rather than against you.”

Personally, I am learning to let go of the concept of who I think I am suppose to be and actually being who I am.  For who I am is unlimited possibilities and surrendering to the idea is acceptance of my total self.  

Surrender is total internal non-resistance ... 

it allows you to let go of all beliefs and judgements ... 

it provides silence ... 

and the connection with the Divine.

So why is to surrender so difficult?  One word: Control.  Yet, I’ve noticed that things go much more smoothly when I give up control, allow them to happen instead of making them happen.  And this is difficult for most because we are a control freaks ... you know using perfectly good energy trying to plan, predict and prevent the world.

And where does the control come from ... Fear.  We try to control things because of what we think will happen if we don’t.  We get attached to a specific outcome instead of being open to all sorts of possibilities.  

When we trust that we’re okay no matter what circumstances come our way, we don’t need to micro-manage the universe ... 

The Art of Surrendering ... 

* Natural flow of things ~ Non Resistance ~ Accept What Is *

* Complete acceptance of what is + Faith that all is well even without my input *

Personally, this provides so much relief.  Just think life goes on with or without your input.  So don’t take on the pressure of sorting it all out.  And it is not about inaction.  It is about being in control and choosing to let go ~ consciously and on purpose.

And if you still struggle with surrendering ask yourself ~ what are you afraid will happen if you let go of control?  And when you narrow the fear, question its validity.  Is it true?  Another tip is to make sure you are minding your own business.  Most of the time when we are trying to control things outside of our business, it doesn’t go well.

Mental note: Loosen your grip and feel the freedom ...

Surrender to the highest unconditional love you can imagine and create an outpouring of goodness into your consciousness which gets downloaded into your life.  Know that it takes courage, focus and patience to trust it ... it takes a self loving voyage that is not egotistical or narcissistic ... it is returning home to the infinite Source.

" Detached ... "

What do you believe?

Or do you still conceive? ...

Detached, crawl inside my head

Open up my mind is all they told me, told me

Detached, I don't relate to your fantasy

But I'm detached

See what you do to me

You feed off my mind, well then you break my ability

To maintain a 20/20 vision on myself

So why not, why not, why not let the pain go? ...

~ Spineshank ~ Detached ~

***

What is detachment and why is it so important regarding suffering?  Well, the essence of Buddhism says life is suffering, desire is the root cause of suffering and detachment of desire brings an end to suffering.

So then are desires the problem?  No, because desires simply arise, sometimes involuntarily, and are a part of being human.  Hence what Buddha was addressing is when we have a strong “attachment” to a particular outcome.  

You know the saying, if you want to give God a laugh, make a plan.  Well I know in my case, he has truly had some good belly laughs, probably rolling in the aisles ...

Life doesn’t always go the way we want.  Therefore to experience peace in our lives, we have to go with the flow or roll with the punches.  Yeah I know ... easier said than done, because it is so easy to be a victim ... shoulda, coulda, woulda and why me scenarios.  But understanding that those who view life in this way have a strong attachment to outcomes, increasing their suffering.

I have blogged about acceptance and surrendering to whatever is.  Yet, through meditation and further teachings, I am learning about “non-attachment” or “detachment” and the important role it plays in coping with life.  I am learning that unfavourable circumstances could be seen as a blessing in disguise to deepen my inner experience ... 

... what if you turned your what if into believing that everything is unfolding perfectly, according to a flawless Divine plan.  Then non-attachment is easier to achieve.  Every event can be viewed as our own perfect creation to learn and grow ...

Believe that the Divine is never wrong ... 

Another belief I use to have regarding detachment was that it came from a place of selfish isolation, withdrawal, disconnection and simply disengaging.  Now I am beginning to understand that detachment encompasses stillness, compassion, empathy and loving kindness.  It arises when we let go of our attachment to some things and our resistance to others.  When we stop needing things to conform to our desires, we can help let go of our egos desire using pure love as our ally.

My meditation teacher explains to us that detachment can make us feel as if we have mastered our attachments because we are no longer disturbed by them.  He explains to us that we must also practice patience as detachment enters our lives in stages and fluctuates with this process.

And being a student of life, I understand that I am just on the tip of the iceberg in this process ... to bring more awareness in my life, to lessen the hold of attachments and to eventually experience true liberation.

The essence of the Way is detachment 

~ Bodhidharma ~

" The Age Of Worry ... "

Close your eyes and clone yourself

Build your heart an army ...

Know your fight is not with them

Yours is with your time here

Dream your dreams but don't pretend

Make friends with what you are

Give your heart then change your mind

You're allowed to do it

'Cause God knows it's been done to you

And somehow you got through it

Alive in the age of worry

Rage in the age of worry

Sing out in the age of worry ...

Act your age in the age of worry

And say, "Worry, get out of here!"

~ John Mayer ~ The Age Of Worry ~

***

We all worry but some of us more than others ... and sometimes to the point where it becomes a problem in itself.  Spoiling your life with worry.  

So what is worrying?  Worry is spending a lot of time thinking about bad things and being preoccupied with negative possibilities.  Gloomy thoughts about what might happen in the future, about what is happening in the present, and about what is already in the past.    

Future Fears ... concerning yourself with things that may or may not happen such as accidents or illnesses or what happens next.

Present Fears ... feeling anxious about a situation you are powerless to change but also about situations you can do something about.  

Past Fears ... once it has already happened there is often nothing you can do to alter it.  Yet continuing to worry about what you could have done differently.

Our bodies chemically react to the fear 

that worrying can create ... 

Fear affects our digestive system ... worry releases adrenalin so a rush of it can cause stomach aches, head aches and make you feel ill.

Fear affects our sleep ... we usually feel worse at night.  We have no distractions, we become anxious and it is much easier for our thoughts to get out of perspective at night.  

The more you worry, 

the bigger your worries become ...

So why worry?  Well, for me, my worrying is connected to my lack of confidence.  Fear.  And that is hard for me to admit but it is easier for me to worry about something than to do something about it.  Sometimes it is easier for me to just dwell.  The more problems I think I have, the less able I feel I can cope with them.  This increases my sense of helplessness, reduces my confidence and makes me more vulnerable to my fears.  

Also I think subconsciously if I “worry enough” I can prevent bad things from happening.  But the fact is that excessive worrying taxes my mind and body into overdrive as I constantly focus on “what might happen”.

Believe that you are capable 

of taking action or handling a bad situation ...

Yes easier said than done, for me.  But I am learning. 

• Learning to talk it over with others helps me to consider a possible course of action not formulated on my own.  
• Learning to face whatever I know about the situation and what I can do about it. 
• Learning to blog/write down what is troubling me 
• Learning to consider action about a situation I feel anxious about and that is preoccupying my thoughts 
• Learning to focus on shifting negative thoughts with positive ones by seeing worries as physical objects that can be discarded (thru meditation)
• Learning that exercise can change the focus from my mind to my body, resulting in less tension, better moods & overall sense of well being

I have to tell myself that trying to predict your fate and future is futile so quit trying.  Life is a flux, it keeps moving and worrying is the mind’s means of pretending as if it’s in control.  I do what I can and and leave the rest to destiny.  Because when I deeply realize that life is not controllable I understand truth is to live in surrender to what is.  

Worrying is like riding a rocking horse, it doesn't get you anywhere