" Who Are You ... "

I took the tube back out of town

Back to the Rollin' Pin

I felt a little like a dying clown

With a streak of Rin Tin Tin ...

I stretched back and I hiccuped

And looked back on my busy day

Eleven hours in the Tin Pan

God, there's got to be another way ...

Who are you?

Who, who, who, who?

Who are you?

Who, who, who, who? ...

~ The Who ~ Who Are You? ~

***

Who are you today?  Who were you yesterday?  Who will you be tomorrow?  What popped into your mind?  Did you immediately think of your job title?  Did you identify yourself with a relationship?  Did you describe your body, your personality or favorite hobby?  

The notion of identity, of who we think we are ...

We are so quick to identify ourselves using our circumstances, how others perceive us, our behaviours, or our positions in life ... which limits our growth, leaves us lost and confused.  Ironically, these same labels can give us a sense of belonging, security, shape the way we act and feel but they are misleading because none can fully describe the multifaceted reality of being human. 

I think the most damaging is when we cling to negative identities ... “I am diabetic, I have cancer, I am no good with money, I can’t sing” ... we cling because it is part of our comfort zone.  You see we know our boundaries, what we can and cannot do, so we never venture out.  

Think about it ... if the labels we give others stem from our shallowest impulses and prevent us from really knowing another person, the labels we assign to ourselves are even worse. They destroy us from within. No matter what the label, the more we cling to it, the more pain we are going to suffer. 

So how do you expose the real YOU?  Start with recognizing the identities you are holding on to.  Next speak about them in a different way allows you to detach from them.  The reality is that you are not your circumstances, you are not what you do, you are not roles and you are not your thoughts and beliefs.  

Here are some examples of how looking with a different perspective changes things ....

phrase                                             re-worded

I have cancer                                   my body has cancer

I am broke                                       I would like to have more money

I am disabled                                   I am a person with a disability

I am fat                                            I would like to be more healthy

I hate my job                                    I would like to find another job

I am just a stay at home mom           I raise my children

The idea is that after you can no longer do what you do, whether by choice or not, you will still be you.  Knowing how to let go of any given identity without losing our essential selves yields a security we'll never get from fame, power, money, beauty, or any other personality prop.  Through stillness we remain ourselves no matter what happens ... loss or gain, pain or pleasure, fame or disrepute.  

Hence when the bad labels come at you glue-side up, or the positive ones are stripped away, ask yourself “who are you really?” ... 

" Judge Not ... "

Don't you look at me so smug

And say I'm going bad

Who are you to judge me

And the life that I live?

I know that I'm not perfect

And that I don't claim to be

So before you point your fingers

Be sure your hands are clean

Judge not

Before you judge yourself

Judge not

If you're not ready for judgement-Whoa oh oh!

~ Bob Marley ~ Judge Not ~ 

***

We all do it.  Every one of us.  We tell ourselves that we don’t want to and maybe we don’t really mean to.  But we do.  We judge people ... especially when someone keeps on doing the same annoying thing day after day.  We point out their faults and therefore judge.

To promise we won’t, In practice, it is easier said than done, yet if we honestly monitor our minds, we realize how difficult or even impossible it may be to judge nothing that occurs.  

So what is it about judging that makes it so hard to let go of?

Considering that to judge, drains our energy, is debilitating and makes us tired ... why do we feel compelled to pronounce our judgement and correct the errors of the world around us?  

Perhaps conflict and judgement are connected, and our conflict with authority is the source of all our judgements.  First, consider the authority figures in our lives ... boss, parents, teachers, etc ... then determine how we feel about them.  If they express an opinion that affects us and carries some weight with us, they can be considered an authority figure.  And depending on if we respect, fear, admire, resist or resent them, directly affects how much we value their opinion.

Oh and of course, we inadvertently learn from them too.  If their opinion matters, when they judge us, we judge us.  Then we issue our proclamation, and determine the true nature of reality ... 

but is reality truly up to us?  

So we continue the cycle and ultimately we judge others because we want to.  It establishes us as superior and validates our independent authority.  Just as previously done to us.  Basically, it builds up our ego by allowing us to perceive differences.  Allowing us to maintain our place as the ultimate authority.  We evaluate to justify our own autonomy and feel we must judge against all competitors.  We play the judgement game ... but how is our rule better than others? 

Instead, prior to judging, maybe we could ask ourselves  “Am I choosing not to know him?”.  Maybe we can chose to know the true worth of others instead of perceiving wrong in them.  

Isn’t it our choice of judgement that causes our perception? 

Realize that when you judge you are trying to be the author of reality.  Judgement imprisons you by making you into something you are not.  Striving for a peaceful existence, you can live this simply by knowing who you are ... the freedom of total acceptance just as you are, as you are in reality.