" Giving … "

Giving me calm to fall into 

Giving me hope to guide me thru 

I want more I want more 

Giving me light to see thru tears 

Giving me strength to crush my fears 

I want more I want more 

Still all I need is love 

So give me more 

Giving me choice so I may seek 

Giving me faith so I'll believe 

I want more I want more 

Giving me breath of your mercy 

Giving yourself to comfort me 

I want more I want more 

Still all I need is love 

So give me more

~ Collective Soul ~ Giving ~ 

***

During the holiday season, many are frantically trying to find that special gift for the special someone.  The season of giving .  So, have you ever given any thought to the type of “giver” you are?

You may not have really thought about it.  You see we are told that Christmas is about giving and receiving.  We give to get something in return .. even if it is a thanks from recognition of having given.  So why then does holiday gift giving make us feel anxious and pressured?  Isn’t it suppose to make us happy?  After all, we are MORE blessed to give than to receive.

This time of year is usually described as time with family, religious activities, traditions, spending money, helping others and giving & receiving gifts.  And these gifts reveal the nature of the connections we have with others ... it exposes the character and the thinking of the giver.  Perhaps Christmas giving makes us anxious because it is an exchange.  Perhaps we dread receiving the bad gifts as much as giving it …

So here is an unofficial list of the type of gift-er you may recognize ...

The Genuine Giver

Someone who actually think about you and what you prefer.

The Status Hound Giver

Someone who shows their money or power by giving a costly gift that has nothing to do with the recipient.

The Wolf In Sheep’s Clothing Giver

Someone who think they are a wonderful giver but are no more genuine than the Status Hound.  Christmas is about them and will likely send a check or re-gift out of obligation.

The Power Player

Someone who manipulates the symbolic nature of the gift because they understand how gifts can cause pain, consciously or unconsciously.

The Complainer

Someone who talks endlessly about the inconveniences he or she experienced during the holiday season, especially during the acquisition of your gift (another reason there is alcohol at most parties ...).

Regardless of the “type” of giver you may connect with, giving truly is from gratitude that we have more than others.  This year, consider something different.  Volunteer at the soup kitchens, give old clothes to the thrift shops, or donate money to a local charity.  This year consider giving with the message that “you have a special place in my heart” because those are the most wonderful gifts to give and receive  

" Holiday ... "

Everybody spread the word

We're gonna have a celebration

All across the world

In every nation

It's time for the good times

Forget about the bad times, oh yeah

One day to come together

To release the pressure

We need a holiday

You can turn this world around

And bring back all of those happy days

Put your troubles down

It's time to celebrate

Let love shine

And we will find

A way to come together

And make things better

We need a holiday

Holiday Celebrate

Holiday Celebrate

~ Madonna ~ Holiday ~

***

Holidays ... magical traditions to be savored.  At least that is what we are force fed by mass media.  Plus thanks to this season’s high expectations, holiday stress has become an acceptable tradition too.

So what brings this on? ... Well most of us tend to over commit instead of enjoying the moment.  As well, we may overload ourselves with inherited traditions that no longer fit our lives.  Because really ... do you really have only home-made baking, can't you just start your own traditions?

The spirit of the holidays is gratitude and giving ...

Of course it is so satisfying to support those we love and do something positive for our community.  Yet the conflict arises when we continually agree to things that please everyone but ourselves ... when we commit to task for which we have no time or desire.

The secret to cutting holiday stress is just saying no ...

When we continually agree to every demand that comes our way, we lose the joy in the effort.  We lose the entire reason for doing.  But when we know our priorities, we can turn down the less important things and focus on what matters most to us.  

Some ways to reduce your holiday stress include:

• Decide on which events you want to attend ahead of time
• Draw names for a gift exchange or buy one gift for the household
• Pool your money and invest in a professionally done family portrait with prints for everyone
• Rather than gift exchange, enjoy a holiday get away with the family
• Rather than gift exchange, donate to a charity 
• Have a potluck Christmas dinner to lighten the cooking load

Really, the list can continue ... when you put your mind to it, you can come up with many ways to lighten the load.  And chances are your ideas will be a relief for everyone, allowing them to meet realistic expectations and turn the holidays back to Christmas from Stress-mas ... and who knows, you may start up a new tradition in the process.