" Rest ... "

“ ... You'll have to excuse me, I'm not at my best

I've been gone for a month

I need home for a rest ... 

There so-called vacations

By the light of the moon she'd drift through the streets

A rare old perfume so seductive and sweet

She'd tease us and flirt as the pubs all closed down

Then walk us on home and deny us a round ... “

~ Spirit of the West ~ Rest ~

***

Rest is not what most people think it is.  It isn’t recreation like hiking, watching TV, gardening, reading or getting wasted.  They may provide a restful space, but they are not rest.  

Rest can be defined as a kind of waking sleep, experience while you are alert and aware, like a bridge to sleep.  We achieve rest and sleep the same way, by allowing it to happen.  

When we rest, we allow our bodies to dissolve stress.  The body’s relaxation response can lead to physlogical changes, similar to yoga, meditation or a day on the beach.  

And the spiritual benefits of resting is profound.  When you slow down and get quiet, you can actually begin to hear you own inner knowledge.  When we make space in our lives, it helps us to make sense of life on life’s terms.

Having the ability to take a few conscious breaths, during which you focus on your inhalation and exhalation or the space between breaths ... 

Having the ability to make a statement and do nothing, does something for you.  Having the desire to put boundaries around so you can claim that time ... 

Most of us need to learn how to rest.  The more we integrate periods of rest and silence into our daily lives, the bigger the payoff will be.  And  during crisis, more rest and silence are called for.  It is similar to preventive medicine.  So important to make it intentional and make it a sacred time.  

The yang lifestyle can cause damage to our quality of life.  So this activity of REST, allows us to restore our body, mind and soul.  Concentrated rest confronts stress in both ways.  It reduces the demands of the situation  and it reduces our energy for that demand.  We have an opportunity to reflect, strive for balance, and again hold reserves for life’s emergencies.  

Properly developing a discipline of concentrated rest requires both inward and outward changes. So, stop focusing on what you don’t have and start enjoying the things that you do.  And plan your rest.  It is hard to simply be but test will come only from intentional planning and planning rest will come only if it is truly desired. 

Fortunately, we can decide that we are not a victim of time demands, we are creators and acceptors of them.  We can take responsibility of our life.  And so, we are as busy as we choose to be.  Embrace simplicity of a life that focuses on your values and not your possessions.  That concept in itself, will slow things down.

Remembering that rest is not a sign of weakness, but a vital choice to only further enhance your overall growth.  Living is when we starting enjoying rather than just producing ... resting included.

www.walkstrong.ca

" Solitude ... "

In my solitude

You haunt me

With dreadful ease

Of days gone by

In my solitude

You taunt me

With memories

That never die

I sit in my chair

And filled with despair

There's no one could be so sad

With gloom everywhere

I sit and I stare

I know that I'll soon go mad

~ Billy Holiday ~ Solitude ~

***

There are times when we need a variety of ways to cope with life pressures.  The need for balance and some sense that we are still steering the ship of our life.  Otherwise we feel overloaded and we overreact.  One way is by seeking solitude.

But it is important to know the difference between solitude and loneliness, because they are often confused for one in the same.  They may look alike because they are characterized by solitariness.  But that is the only thing they have in common.

solitude restores your mind and body, 

loneliness depletes them 

...

So what is loneliness? ... it is a marked by a sense of isolation and a negative place.  When you are lonely you feel like something is missing.  And perhaps the most bitter form of loneliness is when you are with people but still feel it.

Solitude on the other hand is a state of being alone without feeling a loss of something or someone.  It is a positive place where one can engage in something constructive.  It can be desirable as you provide yourself what you need, by yourself.

Solitude: an opportunity to refresh, replenish and renew ourselves 

...

Ideally, if you had to choose a state, solitude is your best bet.  Solitude can be a time that is used for reflection, inner searching or growth.  Activities such as meditation, in-depth reading, experiencing the beauty of nature and even creativity requires solitude.  

Solitude: a means of enjoying the quiet and whatever it brings 

that is satisfying, from which we can draw sustenance 

...

But the trap is falling into loneliness ... a state of discontent, a sense of estrangement, a place of deficiency.  And worse, loneliness can lead to depression.  One way to view it is loneliness is imposed on you where is solitude is something you choose.  

Personally speaking, I have struggled between the two.  At times craving solitude, only to have it turn into loneliness and deep depression.  I am slowly learning not to be ashamed when I need a hand up, when I need to reach out, and when I need to ask for help.  

On the positive side, I am learning to be okay with solitude.  I am understanding solitude gives me time to know myself.  It is a counterpoint to intimacy.  It allows me to have a self worthy of sharing.  If I can catalogue my thoughts without having to filter them through other people’s opinions, I think more clearly and regain perspective.  Things don't seem as overwhelming, I stop grasping and clutching and controlling and allow the flow of life to happen.

The key for me is to have a peaceful atmosphere surround me and let my free will inspire my feelings of serenity without the fear of loneliness taking over.  It’s really about giving myself the time to develop a closer relationship with me, and that time is coming ... 

solitude pain with deep calm hope pastel by Prasenjeet Chakraborty